We made it to Las Vegas friday night. Lindsay and her new man, Dave, were there in 2 vehicles to pick us all up. Dave took all of the bags in his truck and Lindsay took the babies and both my wife and myself in her Escalade. She has so many gadgets on it I can barely find the radio to turn it down. It’s really tricked out. She told hugged and kissed my cheek than said I put all of the guns up this time. I said good because the boys are walking around a lot better this time. My wife just looked at us as if we were nuts.
We got everything set up and then she gave us the 5 cent tour. Her house is amazing. They did a great job on it. Her pool is a lot bigger and her kitchen is my dream kitchen. She has a lot of stuff I want. She told me I can’t have any of it or even touch it. She knows me so well. She showed us to our bedroom and it’s very nice. She has everything in there that I asked for. We set the boys up in the room next door where she put cribs for us. She also started yanking out stuffed animals and for whatever reason my little Heston latched onto the small dinosaur. He had to have it with him everywhere. He has never done that before. Alex has a few he loves and carries around but this was Heston’s first buddy. It was very endearing. He calls it dada. Of course because that’s one of the 10 words he knows well. He also likes to run over dada when he takes off walking. Dada hits the floor like an old piece of sausage and forget it Lol I thought that was funny.
We all ate the big meal Lindsay and Dave made for us. It was so good! I ate 2 helpings. It really was very delicious. Then I told her my plans. She said she had zero plans of going and doing anything all weekend. Her and her girlfriends were all gathering to babysit the boys. She asked if she could take them to 2 places and told me all about them. I said yes as long as she watched them closely. My wife said she was fine with it too. I keep forgetting I now need to ask if it’s okay with her as well. I’m so used to just deciding on my own. We are a family now and as I’ve learned (And been reminded, gently) I need to think of US and WE not speak as myself anymore. We still haven’t had our first fight. But I can tell you whenever it comes and for whatever the topic will be, I am going to lose. There is no way I can out argue my wife. I have heard her on the phone at night talking to people at work and she does not back down. One thing I love about her. She stands up for what she believes in.
We all hung out and just relaxed. The flight was a lot for the boys and I know it was too much to take them out the first night. My dog made himself at home very quickly. Of course he has his own room which he doesn’t sleep in. He sleeps with Lindsay Lol Which is fine by us because that gives my wife and I a break from his snoring and pushing our feet all over the bed at night. Lindsay loves him as much as I do and has had serious talks about kidnapping him someday. She keeps telling me how much happier he would be with her. That he loves Las Vegas and belongs there. That’s not going to happen. He just ran around the house and yard and played with all of the toys he got. He also tried to take off with Dada, Heston’s new buddy, and Heston had a complete meltdown. I had to wipe dog slobber off as fast as I could then give it back to him. That made him calm down immediately. And if you are wonder, yes he was able to bring it home with him. Lindsay tried to give us all of their stuff to take with us but I told her leave it there for our next visit.
Saturday my wife and I got up early and went hiking. It was cloudy and a little rainy off and on. That wasn’t cool but we worked it out. Then we got dressed and went out for breakfast. We had a nice time together. The conversation started into the pending adoption of a girl. She said that when she thought she was pregnant she was slightly excited but wondered about my reaction. I explained if you were pregnant and we adopted a little girl I would freak out because that’s too many kids under 2 for me to handle. That may potential 4 kids under 2. That’s nuts. She said good because she was a little hurt the way I reacted. I said we either need to work on having our own baby and that may sideline your career plans for the next year or we just focus on getting our marriage stronger, and more time together and wait a year or 2 for the adoption to go through. Once the adoption happens then we can start working on having our own baby. She said what if we reverse it. She said what if we string out the adoption longer, which I can do, and start working on our own baby. I said but that’s your plan. She said she’s got baby fever. I said WHAT????? But??? You??? said??? and she just laughed. She said she just didn’t want to plan it all out. With the adoption it’s a huge question mark and it may actually take 2 years. She wasn’t sure waiting 2 years is what she really wanted. I said well I want as many kids as possible. I know in my heart I want to adopt a little girl. I know that but the rest is up to both of us. She said she wants us to think about having a baby now. I said let’s go Lol She said no here and not now. But let us think on it now. I said okay.
So now I may end up with 4 kids in the next 2 years Lol I wanted to string it out longer. So that my boys have a little gap between siblings and I can give plenty of attention to each of them. It really is hard raising twins. I don’t care how easy some people say it is or what they do to make things easier. It’s hard. And for me it’s a constant worry. I think about my wife and the boys all day. Even at work and constantly question my decisions on if I’m doing this right. Half of the time, guys, I feel like a bad dad. I feel completely stupid and think to myself how I’m screwing up these 2 precious little babies. Then I see how happy they are to see me or how much they don’t want me to leave in the morning to go to work and I know I’m doing somethings right. My wife is very happy. I may be doing a good job. But I don’t know.
I really thought she wanted to work on the marriage for the first year. And try to get in our own little rhythm. That’s why we put Sarah in her own condo until. But maybe that wasn’t enough. She said we have Sarah and 2 other nannies. We can do this. I don’t know. I want to be selfish and wait but then again I really think having a baby with my wife would be amazing. I don’t want to hurt her feelings. We did talk about it all weekend. It was exciting and scary and a really fun idea. So I don’t know what to do. I’m going to pray on it more.
We went to see 2 movies, 2 shows, had every meal together. We spent time with the boys but we mainly focused on ourselves. I did receive some hilarious photos of my boys in a huge suds pools with their faces all covered in soap suds. Then I got a video of them laughing so hard. Both of them. Lindsay had taken them to an indoor pool place that has an area for babies. She said it’s a new place and seems very clean. Then she also took them to a huge park. She put them on the swings and sent pics and videos of that too. My dog got to go to the dog park 2 times a day and Lindsay bought him small ice cream cones and a hamburger each time. I said he’s going to expect that now every time we go in the car. She said so what.
Sunday was all about packing up and taking photos. We really did have a great time and I do miss Lindsay a lot. She is in Mexico a lot now and Dave said even when she is home she is working a lot. He said they only go out to eat 2 times a week now instead of the nightly venture. He said her no drinking rule has helped him a lot and he really doesn’t miss it anymore. He’s a nice guy. I have always liked Dave. I miss Ben and I did get to see him. I introduced my wife to him. He is happy and doing fine. He still hangs out with Lindsay a few times a month and doesn’t like Dave Lol I told him she is happy so we all have to be happy for her and that I liked Dave a lot. He’s a nice guy.
The flight home was quiet. My boys passed out and my wife was able to come sit with me a little on the way. She loves that I have my own plane and can pilot it myself. She says it makes her feel like we can go anywhere we want without anything getting in the way.
We got home and Sarah helped get the boys in the bath. I got all of the bags upstairs and my wife started going through all of our mail. We brought Sarah some gifts from Lindz and she started laughing at some of them.
We really did have a great weekend. And we may have decided to start trying to have a baby together. If that’s what she wants. I’m slowly coming around to the idea. I just didn’t want to have a baby and 2 months later our adoption goes through. It will be just like having twins all over again. And as we all know, I almost didn’t make it Lol
God bless you all, have a great week at work everyone! I will update more tomorrow.