Let’s recap. My twitter account @notbatmanyet was suspended for 2 days. The trolls worked very hard to get me sent to the Twitter ban office. I was stuck there for 2 days. Lindsay made a phone call, boom I’m back. And we got all of the information I needed to find out who, what was reported, and why. Take one giant guess who did it. Yeah, I’m not shocked either. She really is pathetic, isn’t she. Moving on.

We are packed and going to Atlanta tonight. Slightly warmer but it says it’s going to be cloudy. As long as it’s not a** deep with snow, I will survive. We are leaving the condo at 5:30pm. Hahaha Okay okay. We are leaving the condo as soon as I load up all of the bags. I tried to load them up last night but all 4 women told me they would add in last-minute things. So I can’t do that. I never win. Ever. I guess that’s what I get for practically living with 4 women but still. So me and my boys will be hanging out a lot. I’m very excited about that. I’m going to miss my dog like crazy. I always do when I’m away from him. He would come but I’m still worried about his cold and the flying. His vets said he might be okay and that was enough for me to say he’s not coming. I really don’t want to make it worse on him. His cold has lasted over a week. He’s getting better but it’s been worrisome.

Work has gone great this week. Busy as usual. We are all focused on getting all of the cities going strong. I want to leave things in good shape for Lindsay on December 31st. I’m enjoying all of my meetings. Well not all of them. But most of my meetings I like to listen and ask questions. I like to hear what everyone else thinks. It’s a lot different. I’m better at listening. My wife has already trained me on that one. She’s an attorney so I have to listen otherwise I get litigated at Lol And then she lets me know the reasons why I wasn’t listening. I thought it was just because the game was on and I wasn’t paying attention but no there’s always a deeper reason like I enjoy ignoring her just so I can piss her off or something crazy like that. This is why I can’t wait until my boys get bigger. Then it’s going to be an all man zone.

Oh I also am doing a book signing in Atlanta on Saturday from 2 to 4 downtown. It’s at a real book store this time (Thanks for the last one publisher people) and I’m happy to sign my name, take photos, and answer the obvious 4 questions I always get at these book signings.

Did you really have an affair with Meri Brown?
Do you still talk to Meri Brown?
Is Lindsay real?
Why did Meri say you don’t exist?

My wife is never invited to these things because all she does is roll her eyes at people who come up to me. My photos are getting leaked. Not very happy about that but it’s life. I’ve been spotted around Chicago more frequently and I’ve got a little following going. My routine is not an actual routine. I sort of go to all different places. I don’t shop at the same stores. I don’t eat at the same places for lunch. Most of the time I eat at my desk at work. I don’t really enjoy going out into the public and eating lunch. There is always that 1 person that has a side glance at me. And I know what they are thinking so I shuffle away from them before they have the balls to ask me Lol Evade! Evade!

I did watch the Netflix series Bloodline. We all got hooked on that one. Such a great show. Has anyone else watched that one? We are done with it and need a new pick. The girls come over and we knock out 3 hour-long episodes a night. We all get into the plot and wonder who did what. It’s great. It has replaced our board games/card games. I much prefer sitting on the couch next to my wife not looking at my phone. She can look at hers but I am not allowed. It goes on the counter so she has my undivided attention. Because if she didn’t take it away I would work all night on emails and I would not be “present and really paying attention to her.”

We have been married 4 months now. Anyone that had a bet on it not lasting 4 months, you lost, and shame on you for betting on that. Lindsay gave it a year. She said after a year of my wife taking all of my shit and bossing me around I will snap and hit the divorce button. I’m not really sure there is an actual button but I have no plans to hit it. I am in constant fear that my wife will meet someone her own age and hit the button first. She loves me and the insecurities are real but we are in such a great place, I worry. Everything is almost too perfect. She is not checking my phone as often. Not that she will find anything. She does get offended by some of my friends group chat things. She mostly laughs at how stupid we all are and asks why we do and say these things. We just do. We have always been like this since high school. We can’t help it. And she says boys are weird. Yes we are.

Today will go fast because I’m excited to leave. I hope my boys take a good afternoon nap and will be ready to go as soon as I get home. I’m leaving at 4 so I can trek home and start loading the ungodly amount of luggage my family is taking. Thank goodness for skycabbies that help. And we did rent an SUV to drive around. My wife will be so happy when she sees it. She’s always wanted to drive this one. I’m happy to make her small and big dreams come true. I hope traffic in Atlanta is good to us. Last time I was stuck in traffic for over and hour and I wasn’t thrilled.

Here’s to a fun weekend, a peaceful book signing, and a Sunday full of appreciation.

Happy St. Patrick’s day everyone! It’s my wifes’ families national holiday. They are all Irish Catholics and we are all decked out in green today. My tie looks awesome. It has metal shimmery green leprechauns on it. My wife bought it for me. She thought it was cool. I agree.

Have a good day! Love ya’ll!

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