My wife has a cold and she’s not pregnant

Last night my wife said she had the beginning of a sore throat. She thinks it’s a cold. I was trying to figure out how to politely tell her to go sleep next door in Sarah’s half of the condo when she told me she took a bunch of Vitamin C and thinks its better she stays away from the boys for a few days. Problem solved? I don’t know. I told her I think maybe she should go next door and she said if it progresses she would. I’m glad we think alike because that might have turned into our first fight.

Yesterday I was pretty busy at work. We have had a lot going on and some days it’s hard to keep up. I’m very glad this is my last year working like this. The travel schedule, the meetings, it is too much. When I get home I’m still trying to do everything for my babies because I want to. It’s exhausting going at this pace. I love my career and I love my family. It’s hard to find a balance.

The good news I can share finally is that I have passed (Again) all of the adoption requirement things I needed to. The hurled this time was that my wife will not be on the adopted child’s paperwork. She doesn’t want to be and the truth is I really didn’t want her to be either. She will be the mama. But for her own reasons which I don’t understand that well, she said it’s better if she doesn’t. I asked “Just in case?” She said no. That’s not it and began to explain that she feels like these are still all my kids. She has agreed with a lot of my demands although she may not like them. She wants to be able to do what she needs for her career and doesn’t feel if a Just in Case things to me or to us she can still work exactly as she is working now. She knows a family judge would never allow her custody of the kids as many hours as she works and doesn’t see her career slowing down. She is very ambitious. We have always agreed if I pass away for whatever the reason and any/all of our kids are under 18 still they go to Lindsay. Not that does not include any natural kids her and I have together. Then they go with her, of course. I told her I want my boys and any other adopted kids with Lindz because she will devote her life to raising them whereas my wife won’t have the time to do so. Lindz also knows every story about my life, knows how I feel about religion and all of my most important things I want for my kids. She has 22 years with me at this point and said she would completely change her entire life to do it, including giving up drinking and gambling. She has already stopped drinking which changed a lot for her. She is really into getting healthy and doing a great job. My wife can’t make the same kind of decisions because of her career and said if it came to raising the kids full-time or giving up her career she said she would honestly choose the career. I asked even if she inherited Sarah and the 2 nannies to help her and she said still, the career. I don’t think that’s selfish of her at all. That’s who she is and if she tried to take on raising kids alone she would hate it. She was very brave and honest for letting me know. We had discussed this over and over long before we got married. That’s why in our pre-nup as well as my will it states everything I’ve said above. Lindsay gets my kids. My wife gets as much visitation with them as she wants and would stay in their lives. I asked Lindsay would she move to Chicago if I died so that my wife could still be involved and she said yes. She would just cuss me out every time it snowed Lol

My children are more important to me than my career. That’s why I’m changing things up after this year. I want to take a few weeks off in my early retirement so I can figure out what I want to do. I will do something. My great aunt is a total b word and doesn’t want that. That is important work and my cousin Tyson said he would gladly hand it over anytime. He likes the lifestyle but doesn’t like some of the things you have to attend to. It’s not easy. It’s a plush job that someone in our family has to do per my grandmother’s wishes. It was her money that funds everything, we are meant to carry on her legacy for as long as the money lasts, which is probably 10 generations if not more. All I know is my inheritance money has been sitting in the bank since I got it. I live off of what I have earned plus the interest I make from my inheritance money. The bulk of it is for my children. They get everything I have. My wife will also be provided for but my children can have it all.

Our newest edition, whoever she may be will be in our lives soon enough. The adoption agency is ready to start our placement as soon as I tell them we are ready for that. I would like to wait a few more months. I want to make sure we are really ready for this. I don’t know if summer time will be better or fall. I just know sometime this year little baby girl Cooper will be here. And my wife and I are still trying to have a baby too. All of this practice has been great but it also can be a little impatient on the waiting part. In fact when my wife told me she was sick I got a huge grin and she said it’s not that kind of sick believe me I already peed on a stick Lol Drew said it will happen when it happens and that the second time he got his wife pregnant it was much easier than the first. Well at least there’s that. We haven’t been trying that long and we don’t really follow her ovulation schedule or whatever else. We just follow our mood and things happen. Fireworks! Then we wait to see if the stick gets 2 lines or not. So far not, but hey at least we are still enjoying it so far. I have heard the longer it takes the more worn out with the whole process you get. I hope it either happens soon, like now or it happens sometime later in the year. We have a certain window the next 2 months that would be perfect for me. It’s kind of up to her body though and that’s one thing I can do anything about. She has to help us figure all of this baby stuff out. She does a great job and I know my wife will make beautiful babies. She wants our children to have my eyes. I am still scared shitless to pass on any bad part of my medical genetics. I was diagnosed with leukemia when I was 3 years old and have been living in remission for years. It usually comes back when I least expect it and to pass that on to anyone would be devastating to me. This is why I have waited so long to get married and have my own kids. It’s a real threat to my family lineage and I don’t know if I could handle that kind of news. Life is what it is and I have survived this long. I just pray my children are healthy and have no issues.

I better get ready for work. It’s almost time to wake up my wife. Have a great day everyone. I hope you enjoyed all of my update blogs from yesterday. I kind of hit publish one after the other after the other. Yes the photos from this weekend are on my Facebook page. Go enjoy them. I think we looked good!

About Samuel

Single dad of 4 beautiful kids, Heston & Alex my twin boys, and my daughters Peace and Sky. Dad of 2 angel babies in Heaven, Ryan and Talon. Divorced. Semi-retired app developer, business partner, Commercial Real estate investor, Chicago Bears & Chicago Cubs fan, vegan, lifelong Catholic, voting independent party member, guitar playing singer who owns a dog, and 2 cats. We live in beautiful Denver, Colorado. I started my first blog Janaury 1st, 2012. Official owner of and @NotBatmanYet Twitter account.
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  1. Being aware of adoption and parental laws. Any child that is born or adopted while you are married automatically becomes the responsibility of both parents. A strange example: even if a wife cheated on her husband and had a baby the husband does not even need to sign birth cert. He is declared as father. So unless you are married to Lindsay too she can not take over guardienship unless if when you died your wife placed children up for adoption to her. Just wanted to let you know.

    • Thanks but you are completely wrong. I have already filed paperwork to bypass what the law applies to my situation. That may be true for most people but I have my directions in my pre-nup as well as my will and my advanced directive. If I die earlier than expected, Lindsay will get custody of both of my boys. My wife agreed to that prior to our marriage and we have filed all of that paperwork already. I understand you mean for people that don’t have legal papers filed in regards to all of this, but laws also cover legal paperwork you file after a marriage or adoption. Any natural child my wife and I have, of course she gets custody if I happen to die. But we have also set up any more children we adopt, like the daughter we are searching for now, Lindsay will also get custody of that child. That’s how I want it. My wife wants it that way too and my wife can ask Lindsay for visitation which Lindz has already agreed to set up together. My wife does not want to end up with 3 or 4 kids to raise on her own if I pass away. I understand the dedication she needs for her career and I also already took steps to get paperwork in order and find the guardian I want for my children. Because of how my wife feels about all of this, this is why I won’t let her adopt my boys or any other adopted child we bring into our marriage. She doesn’t feel she can handle all of it and I don’t want her to do it if she knows she can’t. I also won’t share custody of my adopted children at all with anyone. I will retain full and primary custody of them and work out visitation if she wants that IF we divorce. We won’t divorce though. We love each other very much and I know in my heart our marriage is forever. Thanks for the comments.

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