I’m pretty sure Lindsay smuggled Pot into my Easter basket. I have no idea how it didn’t get caught going through all of the places during shipping. It’s this tiny little piece of something green. I had to google a photo of actual pot to compare it since I really don’t know what pot looks like. I mean I’ve seen the t-shirts with the leaf thing on it. That’s pretty much all I knew. She swear it’s not pot and told me to eat it. I said no way Lol I threw it away after crushing it in a baggie. I didn’t want a bag of pot in my trash bin for the garbage guys to see. I also wrapped it in a paper bag and my wife said I was being paranoid. I don’t know why she would mail something like that but she swear it wasn’t pot. It sure looked suspicious.

So tomorrow we are finally going to get through the Easter party. We have colored eggs. We have Easter baskets ready and my wife has done a great job picking out our Easter outfits for Church. It’s been a lot of fun but a lot of work. 4 kids, guys. That’s not easy to get things together anymore. My wife has been working so hard at her new job she said she feels neglectful. She is doing a great job putting work stuff away until after all of the kids are in bed. I’m working really hard on my business startup but I am completely failing on the working part. My kids are very active and need/want my full attention all of the time. I can get a few things done early in the morning, during nap time if they all actually lay down at the same time (Rare) or after they are all in bed. Honestly as soon as they are all in bed I’m so exhausted I just want to lay on the couch and crash. Some nights I have even fallen asleep on the touch and wake up to my wife poking me. It’s hard work. My nannies help out but I really want to do this. I wanted all 4 of my kids. I want to really be hands on with every experience. My nannies mostly help me wrangle them while I’m cooking or cleaning up. We had 3 we are down to 2 because the 3rd one was really doing nothing. Brandi handles the day stuff and we have 1 night-time nanny that comes in. She doesn’t live with us. She only comes in 3 nights a week. That way I have 2 nights on, 1 night off, 2 nights on, 1 night off and then we reverse it the next week, 1 night on, 2 nights off. That’s how I’m able to get enough sleep to keep going. It’s working out well. My kids love their nannies, my wife loves the extra help and so far we are managing.

We have had some discussion about moving back to Chicago. My wife said our visas are only for a few years and we would need to make a decision soon on our citizenship. Her job requires certain things and she does want to work her way up the ladder. However, she’s not going to make it as far as she thought she would here. She has a much better chance back in the States. That was something we just didn’t know. Her career is very important to her. The problem is she absolutely loves Paris and so do I. We love it here. We wanted the culture, the proximity to other countries and all of the fun of living abroad. It’s not really be hard being here. We all speak French and most people here do speak English. Everyone has been so nice and kind to our family. We have really tried to be good neighbors and citizens. We don’t want to move back. Her career is something my wife has worked very hard at and she said it would literally break her heart if she had to move. She said it would feel like we failed. It’s a discussion for now but we do have to decide by the beginning of next year. All of the paperwork it takes to get us all here and legal was a nightmare. It took MONTHS. MONTHS to file all of it. Then you have the interviews. And with us we had home visits. We had to prove every kid belongs to me. Of course then came the question of why is my wife not on their adoption papers. Well….she didn’t want to be.

Now she does Lol She said I have kept my word in being a faithful, supportive, loving husband. I have proven that I do treat her like my kids mom. I have never tried to treat her any different. She is their mom. I picked her specifically because she had no problems at all with being a stepmom. She was the one that said from the beginning she wasn’t going to adopt them. In case of a divorce she wanted to be able to visit but not have full on joint custody because of her work schedule. She wouldn’t be able to do it. I understood, I didn’t like it but I knew that there was no way in H E double hockey sticks that I was ever going to share custody with anyone, anyway. That is not who I am. Our marriage is really strong. It’s actually been a lot easier than I thought it would be. I kept hearing how marriage was this or that. It is that way if you treat your wife like an employee. I don’t do that. I treat my wife with respect, no matter how pissed off she makes me Lol I do not do personal attacks. I don’t name call. I deal with things. We talk it out. When we do get mad and I need to go walk away for a few minutes to cool off she allows it. She knows me well enough to know that I’m not going to explode in anger and just start yelling at her. I never have. I’m mostly pretty calm all of the time. I get more upset at Lindsay than I do my wife. That’s a good thing. She decided a few months ago she wants to adopt my kids. I’m very happy to hear it. She was going to be their mommy forever anyway. I don’t believe in divorce. We will be going back to the States for Peace’s birthday this year. That’s at the end of July. We have a court date that same week to do the full adoption. It’s cost me so much money but it is very worth it. I’m happy to share these kids with her. She loves them with all of her heart and it doesn’t matter that they are adopted. I know this is the right choice for her. I also know our marriage can make it through anything. I mean I married this woman and immediately said here’s 3 kids that aren’t biologically mine, come help me raise them Lol She did. She has, She wants them. I love her for that.

We have a lot of really cool moments with our kids but the best is when we see how affectionate they are. My boys love Peace so much. Now that she’s crawling around they just want to be with her every minute of the day. She loves her brothers. Little Talon is growing so much we just don’t know what to do with him. He is 2 months old and the size of a truck driver Lol What a sweet little baby he is.

I honestly haven’t been happier with my life. Things turned out the greatest. I got past some really bad moments and I kept hope alive. I knew my life would turn out better than it was. I’m sorry my mom isn’t here to see how I turned out. I know she is watching me from Heaven and knows that I’m doing okay. That’s all I ever think about. I’m sad for my kids who will never know grandparents or their Uncle on my side. My parents and brother being long passed away is something we will explain to them in time. I wish they were all here. I also am sort of glad they never have to be around my dad. He wasn’t a good person and I honestly don’t think I would have let him near my babies. I want a better life for them than I had.

I’m so happy that Easter is almost here. I just want it to be a fun day and enjoy all of the food we are going to make. One more day and we can finally start the festivities.

I hope everyone has a great Easter! Make the day about the kids and family time. Enjoy the blessings you have in your life and remember that God sacrificed so much for all of us. Without His death, we would never have a life like this. God Bless everyone! We love you all!

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