I sold out…then I hit pause

Because of the nanny situation I’ve decided to sell my app that I was working on to the software engineer that has been helping me create it. I know its monetary worth because I had it appraised and we agreed on a price I was happy with. And then…

I’m trying to deal with raising the kids on my own. I had a part-time nanny that would come in as needed. That did not work out at all. I’m here, trying to balance everything, and it just became too much. I had to choose. The app or the kids. I picked the kids. My kids have always been my dream. My career will be second to them always. I’m trying to get out of having a nanny. I want to figure out how to do the things I want to do and still raise my kids alone. I think that’s impossible at their ages. I know that in a few years they will be at school and I can continue on trying to find my next chapter. I kind of feel like I’m selling myself out or maybe I’m selling myself short. How many single parents have to actually go to a job 8 hours a day and still come home and do all of the family stuff. I can afford a nanny. I can afford several nannies but I don’t want that. I want to raise my kids.

Now a new idea has come up of having a live in nanny who can either stay in the house or stay in the guest house out back and would be available as much as I need. I could keep working on my app but limit the schedule down and mostly work from home. I could keep pursuing that dream and have the freedom to go to meetings and/or travel as needed for the app. I just don’t know. It’s complicated. I like my uncomplicated life. I’m thinking on it but how do you decide such a thing? I don’t need a nanny it’s more of a want so I can keep my app. But does this app mean that much to me? It’s a way to keep working. I’m not someone who can sit around and do nothing. I’m always needing to be busy.

How do you decide? I guess pray. The answer will come to me. I have plenty of time. I just have to figure it all out.

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