So it’s dunzo? Yeah, I think it is

In the progression of working things out with Stephanie I invited her over for dinner last night. We had a lot of fun with the kids, she’s so great with them. We had a chance to go sit out by the lake and watch the crazy waves flow in and out. We got to talking and she had some hard questions for me. If this, what would I do. If that, what would she do. Going back and forth on things, some of her answers didn’t make sense to me. I started asking why she felt that way or why she would do things that way and it just didn’t flow with me at all. We had a deeper discussion and at the end, we both sort of just looked at each other and knew. I said “So it’s dunzo?” and she said “Yeah I think it is.”

She started crying, I felt bad. We hugged and I kissed her goodbye then I walked her out. She didn’t go in the house to say goodbye because she thought that would be hard. I was cool with that. She got in her car and she left. I did feel bad about it later when I was laying in bed thinking it over. I’m glad we at least tried because I really felt I would have regretted not giving it one more chance before I moved. Things are in a good spot. I texted her this morning and I think her and I can be friends. I’m friends with all of my ex’s so that’s not a huge surprise. In fact 3 of them texted me yesterday about my blog post and Twitter Lol They kind of check in with me every once in a while. I’m amazed that I’ve met and dated such incredible women, they still care. I do treat them well and show respect always so that’s a big reason they all have said they want to remain friends. I’ve invited some of them over at the same time for bbq weekends or whatever. It’s never been an issue unless they bring up our dating history. Then it gets awkward and I just laugh and walk out of the room because who wants to be in the middle of that at a party?

Am I maturing? I think I am. Letting go of someone can be hard but it doesn’t have to be drama. I think being completely honest and upfront about how you feel and what you think is key. Also both people listening. It’s no fun at all getting raged on by someone who interrupts every sentence. When they ask you a question, you start to answer and then BOOM here comes all this venom. I’m happy Stephanie and I left it peaceful. It’s nice.

So I’m single again which is fine. I’m not going to date until after I move and get the kids settled. I’ve already decided that. I told Stephanie that too. She appreciates the gesture. She half believes it I’m sure because my dating history has been so many first or 2nd dates then I move on. I’m just out here trying to find love. Again. It kinda sucks but I’m not giving up.

The kids went to day camp. After I dropped them off this morning I went to Church. I signed up to volunteer to help pack up some mission supply boxes. We have 5 couples out of the country on missions and we send them monthly supplies. It was fun getting together with my Church family and spending time laughing as we worked. I took a moment to pray by myself before I left. I feel at peace. I’m doing okay.

So…..

Next is my weekend trip. I’m leaving Thursday and will be all over Periscope showing off my new house. Guys, I’m really excited to see how far they are. I wish I could move in now but I know they are still doing my kitchen. It’s going to be a big change but I’m ready. I worked my a** off to get here. I don’t have to work out there, I don’t have to do anything but be a dad. I’m going to enjoy life, make new friends and figure out what my next step is. I’m so blessed. I really am.

Here’s to my next chapter in life and in love!

Please don’t go to Church

Please don’t go to Church

Lindsay has decided she’s taking all 3 of my kids to Church this morning with her friends. I asked her not to. She’s doing it anyway. They aren’t going to a Catholic Mass. Oh no, she’s taking them to a Baptist Church so they can see what a real Church is like. Keep in mind Lindz does not even believe in God but she said the Baptist really do. Huh? I can’t wait to hear what they thought of that. Peace is going to love it because she just loves everybody. The boys might freak out at first but I think it’s going to be fine. Lindsay said if she “catches the spirit” she’s going to haul ass up and down the aisle like she’s seen on tv a few time with Pastor TD Jakes Lol I said please don’t. She said she may just do it just to see what happens. Dear God, please forgive her. She mocks you. It’s sort of funny. So I guess forgive me too?

I got in a groove and got everything boxed up, taped, labeled, and ready to go. The only thing I haven’t done is put everything in the garage. I need to pull the car out to make room for all of it. Luckily the shipping company is sending a big van tomorrow morning so it can all get out-of-the-way soon. I had to check the weather. In Colorado Springs out of nowhere the rain hits, the wind blows and then it’s all sunny and dry. It’s the weirdest weather I have ever experienced. I’m going to miss it. I have really enjoyed the cooler temperatures. Fall here is so beautiful. I want to take my kids on one of those train rides up through the mountains. I didn’t go the last time they went. I want to see everything. We will do that next weekend.

We are moving back to Chicago now in 2 weeks. It’s going to be a big welcome home party. I’ve missed out on so much but I had to make the right choice for Alex’s health. He’s doing great. I get so many messages asking how he is doing. My boy is a tough cookie. It was very hard at first because Heston just wants to be all over him all day long. When we lifted up his shirt to show Heston his owwie, that’s when he backed off. I’ve had to remind him a million times be careful, Alex has an owwie, he backs off. Not immediately, but he does tend to stop. Peace is doing great, she’s so pretty. My daughter is the sweetest little face on Earth. Heston is just a big brother through and through. He’s in charge of everybody. He tends to take the lead and say Come on to the other 2. They follow him around and do what he wants. It’s very cute to see. Then Peace says deuces and leaves the boys to play trucks or whatever they are doing. She has her little princess setup filled with tons of girl toys. I’ve had more cups of imaginary tea than I can count at this point. She had her toenails painted and she wiggles her toes when you ask to see her tootsies Lol It’s pretty cute.

I just finished watching the online Catholic Mass so that’s done for the day. Such a beautiful message of hope and how to live a balanced life. That’s what I’m currently working on. I do not attend the regular Catholic Church yet they continue to solicit money from me. I read it and toss it. I do donate to my Church and that’s good enough for me. There are differences in how each Church conducts itself and I’m glad to know that my derivation relies on itself and not outside mainstream pressure. That’s exactly why I’m raising my kids to be the “other” type of Catholics.

Today I get to move boxes, chill out, move boxes, chill out. It’s going to be an easy day until the kids get back. Lindsay is bringing them home at 5 so I can feed everyone before their flight takes off back to Vegas. It kind of sucks I had all kinds of summer plans and trips I wanted to get to but Alex is more important than my plans. Next summer we will hit the road and get to do everything.

Prayers to Hawaii. Our family compound took a hit. Everyone is safe but extensive wind damage. They will have to repair all of it when they can. And of course Prayers to Senator/War Hero John McCain and his family. I did not agree with his politics most of the time but I do respect is decades of service to this country. He will be greatly missed. He did the very best he could with what he felt was right. He stood up and spoke when he felt the need. What a life he had. You will be missed. The entire news media is looking back on his life. It’s amazing all of the things he accomplished.

Have a wonderful Sunday my batfans. I love you all. Be sure to praise God in someway because today is going to be awesome!

The coughing is almost gone

Thank you for all the nice messages about Heston. His cough is better. It’s not completely gone and we have him on meds. I pray he doesn’t have allergies like I do. I think it’s just a combo of some things and we are very happy that Alex did not catch it. Yet. I hope the medicine clears everything up and we don’t start passing this one around. We did that last year and I don’t want to go through that again. Everyone got sick in consecutive sections. This is why I make sure to take my vitamin C pill every morning. To help my immune system.

Yesterday I had a very chill day at the house. I didn’t leave. I wanted to be with Heston because he wasn’t feeling well still. He is much better and we had a low-key play on the floor kind of day. He did take a few extra naps and that’s okay right now. I think Alex loves it when he gets me all to himself. He always wants me to hold him and he starts touching my face all over. He’s studying me. Trying to figure out my words I think. He is my little restless boy. He is happy in general but he is always the one crying over things. Heston doesn’t very often. It’s really weird how different they are. The older they get the more they look exactly the same. We do the same baby haircut on them. I’m not growing their hair out. I’ve seen that before on boys and no thanks. It’s just not our style. My wife wanted to grow it out a little and I said no. I change my hairstyle monthly so I know what I like for my boys. Their fine blonde hair doesn’t really show much of a cut yet anyway. I know their hair will thicken up in the next 2 years it’s just in a transitional phase Lol

The ladies went shopping, to a play, to more shopping then I gave my wife cash and told her to take everyone out to eat and bring me back something, please. When they are all getting along and everyone is happy I try to do all I can to keep that going because it doesn’t last long. The trouble isn’t with my wife and Sarah. I really thought that would b the toughest relationship. The trouble is with the 2 part-time nannies and my wife. She expects a great deal out of both of them on the weekends to give us a little time off. They both work 12 hours shifts and they make their own schedules. Whatever they choose that’s what they choose. I don’t have a preference. I just want 24 hour coverage for my boys. When I’m being greedy and want time alone with my boys the girls struggle with that. They are getting paid to do whatever we want. So if I say go shopping they always do a check in a few times to make sure they don’t need to come home. They don’t want to take advantage of the situation. I reassure them we are all fine, I just want alone time because I work and travel so much. I want to actually raise these boys. I don’t know how my parents did it. I don’t want to go out with my friends on weekends or party it up anymore. I get off work happy to be going home to a family. My family. I want every spare second with my boys and I struggle more to have time for my wife. She knows that I try very hard to balance it all out. And let’s be honest, gifts help Lol We don’t fight. Well at least not yet. We are still very much in the honeymoon phase and can’t get enough of each other. She is much better at making efforts, small affections, and time for me. And here we are wanting another child so soon after my boys. I know I’m not Batman (yet Haha) but I still try to save the world. Well actually I try to save myself from the world that never stops.

The truth is some days I feel like a complete failure. I drag myself home at 8pm, my boys are already in bed getting ready to fall asleep. Which means I only get a half hour or so with them for the day. That never makes me happy. I eat a quick supper. Sit on the couch and find out how my wife’s day was. Then I get a full report from Sarah on what happened with the boys, she goes home to the condo next door and I internalize how working so much isn’t worth it anymore.

I have built an empire. It’s a well oiled machine run by Lindsay’s ambitions and my loyal employees. 9 years I’ve been building this thing. And truth be told I’ve spent my entire life working for this. My years in the Marine Corps taught me so much. That’s probably why I still wake up so early in the mornings. Believe me I’d much rather be in bed but my mind won’t shut off and I can’t just flip on the tv anymore. I have a very beautiful, very sleepy wife that does sleep all night. I don’t want to wake her up. I already feel guilty the times I roll out of bed quietly and accidentally wake her a little. A kiss and a go back to sleep usually does the trick. My businesses run themselves. Lindsay is taking more and more control of things. She’s doing a great job and I knew she would. When she sold her own business after 12 years of running things I knew she was very serious about partnering up. Who knew she would have saved up so much cash to really buy into my company. I knew she was always well off because we always fought over who paid for what but I guess I wasn’t paying that much attention to the things she owns. Not leases like the rumor mill started a few years ago.

I will retire at the end of this year not because I can’t do this anymore. It’s all about my children. My dad was never home and never there for me. I don’t want to be that guy. I want to be present and accounted for, daily. I want to have dinner with them, ask about school and be able to take and pick up from school. I want them to know, not just realize but really know that I’m there for them. I am going to do something. I haven’t figured it all out yet. But I am going to do something with a much lighter schedule. I would love to go to Culinary school. I just don’t think my hand can do it. It has been so damaged it’s getting harder and harder to open and close it. It’s my left hand that’s bad and being left-handed I won’t be able to control my knife skills or stir or anything as well as everyone else. My wife has encouraged me to go talk to a chef school and ask them to just give me some basic things to test my hand out. She said if it’s so bad I need to start occupational therapy or something to help make it better. I was doing great last year with it. That’s because changing diapers a million times a day, you get your dexterity going. And within the next year and a half maybe, the boys will be potty trained and we will have fewer things to change or clean up. Just a quick sidenote, you read all of these baby books and my boys do not follow the timeline these books say they will. We are either very early on growth and progress or we are very late. And having twins they don’t do things the exact same days like I thought. It’s close but Heston is usually the first one to do something brand new. I think he teaches Alex more than we do.

I want to be with my family. I want to devote time to my wife so we don’t have marital problems. I’ve seen so many of my friends get a divorce. I can’t judge them for making that choice because I can’t imagine that would be easy. What I do know is that I don’t believe in it and I have no plans to screw up my life so much my wife doesn’t want me anymore. She keeps saying that I’m too perfect. I’m not. Far from it. I am decent and I’m a good man. I want the very best for everyone. Most of all I want my boys to do good things in this world. Whatever that may be. They came into this life having me as their only parent. Now they have a mom and 2 parents who adore them. From that we now have extended family and 1 set of grandparents that love the fact they don’t have to share us with any other family on holidays. They get us anytime they want. That’s one of those sad bonuses about my folks not being here. I think about that sometimes. Would I ever let my boys even meet my dad? I’m sure I would. Would I ever let my mom take them overnight to her house? No. Not if she had stayed with him. I think about my folks more now than I did in the past 13 years. I miss my mom. I really miss my grandmother. She was, is, and will forever be my hero. She is why I’m this way. She is the reason why I feel lost sometimes. She was my guiding light and without her here I am heartbroken. She would have loved that I had the boys and got married. She would have been right there for all of it.

Family is all we have. You don’t always get along but I’m starting to realize, if you do right by your own family, you will do right for everyone else. I love my wife and boys with all of my heart. I plan to have another chill day at home. And when the ladies wake up breakfast will be ready for them. Because cooking is how I say I love you. And them enjoying it is how I know they love me too.

Have a great Sunday everyone! The boys will not be going to Church this morning. Brandi will be staying home as long as we bring back her blessed Starbucks Lol We will be going home around 5, our usual time. My dog is up I need to go take him out. I will update more tomorrow.

God loves you and I love ya’ll too!

Ushering my way to a BBQ

  Church on Sunday was fun. We had a really late date night Saturday which kept us out until 1:30am. I told her this is going to hurt to wake up in the morning and she just kissed me good night and pretty much fell asleep right away.
We made it to Church on time and I had to usher the 1st and 2nd Mass services. She was down in the kitchen helping a few other ladies get the snacks, coffee, and stuff set up for after Mass. Our Church hosts so many great events it was finally our turn to help out on Sunday. I got to do the collection plate which I love to do. I rattle it and start eyeballing everyone to make sure they put in something. Doesn’t matter how much, it only matters they help our Church family out. The money goes for a lot of great services that we all can utilize at anytime we need. I made sure to slip in our envelope for the week. They already take out a direct deposit but we also add in some cash because we know it does go right back to our Church for things they need.
I like ushering because it’s easy and I get to smile at everyone. I also get to help the ones that needed a little assistance getting into their seat. That’s always fun. Everyone is so friendly and nice at our Church. My wife didn’t like it at first but she has finally come to at least sort of like my Church. I told her this is my Church family and they are very important to me. They have helped me get through a lot of things and even after work if I need a little help I stop in to pray before going home. She wondered where I went a few times a month to make me late getting home. Well now she knows. I told her all you had to do was ask. God has always been there for me. I try to appreciate and praise him daily. Most of my retweets are about news stuff or God. Mostly God though.
We left Church and met up with the boys and Heather nearby. They were pointing at me as soon as I walked in so I had to grab their little fingers and kiss all over their faces. They just laugh which is probably the best sound in the world. If you ever get around twins and hear the concert of laughs going it really is funny. We got them all packed up and headed home. It was about time for our bbq prep.
Sarah came over and helped me slice up veggies. My wife slathered the disgusting meat with her secret seasoning she bought, not made. She said it will be hit of the day and it was. She ordered it from some shop her mom goes to. Her dad has used it for years I guess. It smelled peppery, if that’s even a word. Not that my spelling or grammar would know better Lol
And soon my buddies started showing up to help set up and basically start munching on food. Everyone was told to bring a side dish or dessert. I was very surprised 2 of my single guy friends made stuff. I laughed and said did your mom make this for you and they both said nope. It was really good. They both put in a lot of effort and I appreciated it. I appreciated it even more when Cam decided to take over the grill. Smelling meat makes me want to hurl. That’s not very appetizing for a bbq.
The bbq was a lot of fun. Everyone ate everything. And I do mean everything which is fine by me. My nannies get a break because all of my friends want to hold and play with the boys. My dog loves it because he gets so many scraps. And my wife just loves hosting parties. She doesn’t cook or do any of the prep work but she looks beautiful and makes sure everyone has food and a drink. She is so sweet. I like her friends a lot. She’s warming up to my friends and doesn’t like it when we separate off and go talk in a different room from everyone. We just like to catch up and see what’s been going on since last we saw each other.
The beer and wine were flowing. I had my water and then it was time to play this ridiculous game. I know I look horrendous and I know I sound funny and I also know everyone laughs but my boys started really laughing when it was my turn so I made sure to amp it up a little. We all had fun and everyone helped clean up. That was very nice. They left around 8 so we could get the boys in the bath and ready for bed.
I like having parties at the condo. It’s nice at the house too but it’s more intimate and fun at the condo. The parking is always an issue but the hospital is right across the street which makes it easier for them to find a spot.
I am getting ready for a busy work week and I’m excited to see what some of my meetings will come out with. I have a few new ideas I want to share and see what everyone thinks. I also have only 1 out-of-town trip this week. It will be an overnight trip to Pittsburgh so we shall see how that goes. I already know I will miss my wife, boys, and my dog. I don’t like being away from them but the meeting will take 2 days to get through. I pray it all goes well.
Have a great work week guys! I hope you had a fun weekend too.

Sunday Family Dinner

The Bears game was not as fun as I thought it would be. Because we lost and it looked horrible. Where is the offense this year? Why are they not throwing the ball? Traditionally the Bears are a running game but geez. Throw the ball! Cutler looks awful and he says the same excuse every year. We’re working it out. How about you work your way over to the bench Cutler?

Sarah didn’t even know what was going on so she said it was a lot of fun. She even booed when the crowd boo’ed at halftime Lol We did more shopping than eating. Which is great news for me because I have 2 marathons coming up and I don’t need to unfocus my diet right now.

Which brings us to family dinner tonight. Cam started a family dinner tradition with us a while ago. If we are at the lakehouse like we are this weekend he comes over at noon after we get home from Church and running around, and we plan out a menu. Then he hits the store or I go with him and we get what we want.

Today it’s pasta dishes. Lots and lots of cheese and meats. Yuck. Can’t eat either one of those so I’m making myself spaghetti squash and eggplant coins. Yummy! They are very delicious. Even the girls like them. We are going to cook all day until the gravy is thickened and perfect. We will eat at 2 then pack up and head home.

My boys, my adorable baby boys have all of a sudden become mobile. They just scoot themselves all over. And they are both up on their knees a little too. I think crawling is right around the corner, God help us all!

Both houses have been babyproofed since before they were born Lol I am crazy, I know. So we are ready. But are we really? Babies will get in places I never thought so we are trying to figure out some fencing and baby gate options. We have to because Sarah can not chase around 2 crawling babies all day long and also deal with my dog. That’s too much. If we can contain them on one of the living room areas, that’s plenty of space for them to zoom around it but she can also see them from the kitchen when she’s getting food ready.

Which brings me to the next milestone. My boys are eating baby food. Sort of. It’s more spitting it out than actually eating it but we are working on it. We started a little bit last month. Just to see what would happen. That was a no go. So we work on it on weekends and finally out of nowhere they like it. We are still doing some formula too. But it’s a lot of fun for me to sit on a chair and feed my baby birds. It’s so funny watching them try a different flavor. I bought one of each with the baby food. It’s all vegan. And I firmly believe that is the only kind of baby food you should feed your children. It’s the best for them. You can’t really argue that with me. And I won’t listen to any disagreement anyway. They like carrots, peas, and applesauce. Not a fan of anything else yet. We keep trying. It’s so funny when one is full but the other isn’t. So then I keep going until we give the doctor recommended amount. I was unclear on how much to start out with. The doctor told me they will let me know when they are full. And he was right. My boys are chunks! I mean they are not chubby rock by any means but they both weight a lot. Still very healthy and doing great. Things are changing so fast right now. I come home from work and Sarah reports the newest thing one of them has begun doing. It’s awesome.

I am starting to miss our late night feedings. They are sleeping mostly through the nights now. We put them down at 8:30 and they usually knock out around 8:50 each night. They sleep until 5 or 6. Then it’s time to get up. Which is when I get up to workout anyway. So I change butts, feed them, then bring them into my home gym and put them in their playpen. They watch me workout or run on the treadmill. They babble away and pull on their stuffed animals. When one starts crying I have to stop and see what’s up. And usually it’s just an attention thing. Then I get Sarah up, she comes to get them, I finish my workout, shower, eat breakfast then play with them both until it’s time to go to work. It’s a routine. I love it. It works great for me. And it’s working better for Sarah. She used to get up early with them but I told her let me do it because you have the rest of the day to do it. I can always come home and take a nap if I need one.

My life is completely different from a year ago. This time last year I was mending a broken heart and wondering WTF did I get myself into. Now things are completely calm and quiet. My life is awesome and I’m very happy. I’m making better decisions and I’m no longer chasing love. Love is finding me. And I feel so blessed.

Church was amazing this morning. It was about resiliency. I can honestly say I feel like I came from a really bad time in my life and things worked out great. Last year I felt like everything was bad. Now I know that life is meant to challenge you. That’s when it’s time to do your own work and figure yourself out.

I’m still here. I’m still me. And I’m still smiling through everything. Thank goodness God showed me how to forgive and let go. That’s the only way I could deal with all of it.

I am happy. I really am!

Have a great Sunday. It’s time to get this suit off and get ready to stir gravy all day Lol Cam will be here in a few minutes to help me plan out our family dinner.

Love ya’ll!

Sunday is for Relaxing

This morning I got my group up early for breakfast then we went to Church. They all love bagels with different kinds of cream cheese so that was easy to put together. Church was really good. The message was about non-believers in your family or friend group. I of course shot Lindsay a look and she winked at me. I figured during the middle of it she was going to stand up, announce to everyone in my Church there was no God, and that this “story” as she calls it was not true Lol Thankfully she contained herself or maybe it was Ben leaning over whispering a shhhhh every time she said something under her breath but loud enough for others to know she did mumble something. Not sure. I was just happy we all go through it without anything embarrassing or tragic. After I asked if she learned anything and she said yes. She said she learned it takes 25 minutes for “The Guy” (That’s what she calls Father at my Church) to convince her she’s been right all along thinking this is all crap. I just shake my head. We kind of rush through the line as I say a quick bye and get her out of there before she bursts into flames. She swears one of these times she will and I’m starting to think it may actually happen. God likes a challenge and she is probably one of His biggest.

We left Church, dropped off Sarah, picked up all of their luggage and I dropped them off at the airport. She gave both boys a big hug and kiss before she left. Ben held Alex and asked if he could take one. I get asked that a lot. I always say no but when they get to teenage years I may finally answer yes to that. Off we went. I got them to the airport on time but not before 2 fights about seats on the airplane and where was her cellphone charger at, broke out. Ben should be knighted by somebody for putting up with all of that 24/7. I couldn’t do it. She is too much.

I’m back at the lakehouse. I put the boys down for their first nap. I’m updating this blog and trying to remember what else I wanted to do today. I think a little more swimming with the boys. They seemed to really enjoy that. Maybe one last boat ride or maybe I will go out on my jet ski. Not sure. We are going to leave at 6pm. Should only take an hour this time. I don’t think we need to stop at Starbucks like we usually do for the girls but who knows. It’s always a stop or 2 on the way up or on the way home. We can’t help it. My group is always forgetting something we need.

My boys laughed and laughed in the pool. We did not dunk them. That freaks me out. But I did cup my hands a few times and put water over their heads and faces to see if they were cool with that. The first time they didn’t like it. The second time Heston splashed a little. It was funny. Alex loves the water too. He is fascinated with looking at everything. And he was babbling. My boy is a talker. My other boy is not. Which is weird. But I was told this is when the start to show their personalities a little. They look exactly alike but they are not the same. Most things are the same but you have to pick up on their slight differences.

I only dress them alike some times. I want them to know they don’t have to match for everything. In school I have already decided they will not be matching. If they both want to that day okay. But I think I will send them to school in different clothes so that people will treat them as 2 separate boys instead of 2 mixed into 1.

I think Heston is a lefty like me. He grabs mostly with his left hand. This of course makes me very proud. I don’t know if that’s a natural think or I have just shown him how I do things and he is mimicking what he sees me do. Alex always grabs with his right. I think his left arm is just there for decoration. There is no reaching first with the left, ever. But once he yanks the toy down or his bottle down the left joins in and then it belongs to him and you can’t ever have it back Lol

Is that possible the twins are different handed? Is that even a thing? Do I need to change one of them so they are both left or both right? I don’t know what to do about that. I want to just let them be what they are. If they are one of each okay. I mean to be selfish it would be way easier on me to do everything left-handed but I still deal with issues with that daily. It is a right-handed world. Us lefties have to adapt and adjust.

Things seem too perfect. I keep waiting for something bad to happen but nothing is going on. And I like it that way. I am loving my life. Loving my boys and going to spend the rest of my day having fun. I can’t wait for them to get up in a few minutes to come outside to swim with me. We still limit 20 minutes at a time. I get nervous about too much sun. It’s cloudy and nice, the shade trees are very tall and help a lot but it still is a little warm.

I hope everyone has a great Sunday! Last night’s Olympics were fun! Michael Phelps is awesome. What a champion he is. Great to see him finish strong. The ladies swim team, wow. Domination and so sweet. Those ladies have been working very hard you can tell. Congrats to all the countries. Very glad to see you all compete. I can’t believe it’s almost over.

Go have some fun today. It’s going to be a busy week!

Who’s coming with me?

The first official Cooper family bbq/pool party was last night. We decided that needs to be an annual event because it was a solid crowd and really fun. Everyone got along which is hard to imagine with my personal and professional worlds crashing into each other. Even the randoms Lindsay invited from the mall and her boy D-Rock (The party bus guy from Chicago) showed up with even more randoms. And we all just laughed and laughed all night. We ate like locusts, went swimming, played beach volleyball then sat in my gazebo and enjoyed not getting bitten up by mosquitos. At 9 I told everyone time to go I need to get my babies down for the night. No one wanted to go it was one of the those nights.

I really needed this weekend. I have been submerged in a depression for about 2 or 3 weeks now. 2 people told me I was depressed and I couldn’t see it, I denied it, and actually got pissed at both of them for putting a mirror up to my face. Lindsay was one of the ones that pointed it out immediately. When she realized 3 weeks ago that’s what was wrong with me she mustered all of her loving support and said Well call me back when you aren’t such a miserable little bitch I can’t believe you are depressed right now get the f-word over it so we can go have fun Lol She really knows how to yank the knife a few times, doesn’t she.  I feel a lot better. I am realizing when I am depressed that’s when I need to externalize and not internalize. Frankly with everything I have gone through the past few months I’m surprised I hadn’t hit that wall sooner. That’s what my other friend said to me this morning. She also woke me up a little bit by texting me at 5:50am because she’s on steroids and had insomnia. She sent me a photo of her coffee mugs. ???? Yeah I don’t really know either but I called her to hopefully let her say what she wanted to say to me so I could go back to bed. That didn’t work so we ended up talking for an hour and finally I said I need to go get in the shower and get ready for Church. She said that’s fine I’m ready to go to bed now, thanks! Yeah, thanks Lol 5:50am, darling!

I was shocked when I walked downstairs and almost everyone was awake, dressed for Church and munching on cereal and toast. I said am I dreaming this or did Heck Freeze over? Lindsay said I got everyone up and ready so we can all go to your ridiculous Church service as a family. I hugged her. Probably cried a little then said I am so happy everyone is coming with me today! I can’t believe it. She said you have no idea how much these people bitch when you wake them up at 7am and I owe her. Honestly most of my friends are Catholic so they know on Sundays get up so we can go. This was such a surprise. I loved it.

We got to Church. I usually sit up front or close to up front. Today we sat near the back because we had a crowd. Lindsay only let out one loud snort when Father said Let God take all of your troubles to paradise. I smacked her leg and Ben shot her a look. He is not Catholic he is Lutheran so this was an experience for him. He said he didn’t realize we knelt down that much. I said I call it Leg day Lol

After Church I went and got Father and introduced my family to him. He smiled and said he was happy they joined me and we were a good-looking group. Lindsay walked off and went to sit in the truck. Everyone else was not rude they made small talk and I asked Father to pray for my niece and nephew (Drew’s kids, we are not real brothers but we consider each other a brother) to have a fun and safe summer. He quickly prayed over them and told them to keep reading books and don’t eat too much ice cream. They both laughed. They are both amazing kids. Love both of them very much. Then a few people I know wanted to meet everyone so I introduced everyone.

 
We just stopped at a bagel place and everyone got their own bagels, cream cheeses, and drinks. I got an apple and a banana and a bottle of water. I told them we are going to eat on the road today so this was only a snack. I kind of have it all planned out. Now we are back at the house packing up. I am getting ready to make a run to the store to buy up a bunch of snacks and Cheetos for the plane ride. It’s going to be a long day of flying and I love it. I have missed flying around so much. These past few months has really been a passion for me. It’s my own version of Heaven. I feel completely awesome when I’m up there. And my new plane is really, really cool. I love it. It has taken a few trips to get used to but I’m finally learning everything about her. I haven’t named her yet I’m still waiting for inspiration to hit me.

We decided to drop off Drew’s family first because they have the dog. Then go to Oklahoma City to drop off Becky. She has had such a great trip. She said she missed her son who was at his grandmother’s for the weekend but she needed a fun weekend like this. Next we are going to head over to Las Vegas to drop off Peyton, Ben, and Lindz. Then I will come all the way back by myself. Unless Josh does decide to go with us because remember I do still have 1 seat available Lol He said he has been wanting to go with me sometime and this would be a fun day he thinks. When we get closer to Ohare I will call and see if he wants to meet up there. He has already texted me once to ask what time did I think I would be taking off today. I am trying for 11:30 to at least get us all on the plane but we all know that won’t happen unless Lindsay wrangles them again. I’m still in shock they were all up and ready to go Lol I just can’t believe it. I really did hope at least Drew’s family would go to Church with me. He knows how important that is to me. Even though he says they don’t go every Sunday like he knows they should. He said sometimes he just wants to lay in bed and read the paper instead.

I think my dog will miss Drew’s dog. They have been running around together all weekend. He has only stomped her a dozen times because she’s so little but then she just bites his ear and he sits down looking at her like you Bish Lol The girls are going to head back to Chicago when we leave with the boys and the dog. They said depending on if they are almost ready to be put down they may wait a little longer so they can sleep the whole ride home.

I think everyone really did have a good time. So much for impromptu vacations. I am so happy they were here. This is a great start to our summer!

I have 2 big trips coming up than 2 bigger trips coming up to finish out my year. No more overnight or weekend trips until those trips. I will continue to do my day work trips but that’s going to be it. I’m really trying to stay in town with my boys as much as I can. Lindsay has really picked up the slack on that. Her and Kevin have been sharing my work trip schedule. She said it’s fun for about 3 days until you realize you have 10 more cities to hit in 7 days and you can’t get a full night’s sleep because your time zone changes are killing you. People that travel for work I really don’t know how ya’ll do it. It’s not easy.

I will be taking Drew and his family with 4 of my Aunts and Uncles to Greece for an 8 day guided tour. I decided we are going last year and bought the travel package. It was an amazing deal then I had to figure out who to take. 10 people, Greece, 8 days. I may regret that but I think I am so excited to see all the historical sites anything that happens I will roll with it. My boys will not be going on that trip. It’s too much for them. And then after that I am going to Rio for the Olympics! I am going for a 5 day trip to see Lindsay’s cousin compete in the equestrian things for her country. We planned and booked that trip last year way before she got married so she may not be going with me. I will work that out later on.

After those 2 trips a quick break from traveling then I have Paris in November and Dubai in December. I have to do my yearly check ins with those offices and see what we need. Dubai is rolling the money back to the U.S. It’s so great. Paris has always been fickle. I don’t make that much money there but I wanted an International presence and honestly just an excuse to visit there yearly. I am in love with Paris and have been for years. I lived in Paris for a year of my life and loved every day there. My boys will also not be going on those trips. I’m just hoping the judge grants the adoption some time this year. I really pray it happens this year but I was told not to get my hopes up. I will keep praying.

I hope everyone has an amazing Sunday! I know I am. God loves you and I love ya’ll too!