Peyton, I will call you today, I swear

Dinner with Peyton. Here’s what happened.

Damn she looked good. That kind of surprised me. The last time I saw her she was in a beachy summer outfit and not really fixed up at all. I wasn’t either so I’m not bashing her. She cleans up good. She looked great and very professional. She said she created a response team at her hospital and they sent her to a conference downtown to learn more about how to facilitate it, how to staff it, how to get support staff, and how to request budget, equipment, etc. How cool is that? She was pretty excited to tell me all about it. It was interesting to learn about. She even showed me the pamphlet they made today for her to kind of explain what it is.

We caught each other up on our lives. I showed her more recent photos of the kids and pictures of our new house. She said Vegas is close to Denver if we ever wanted to hang out some weekend, she could fly up. I said hmmmm and changed the subject. She dropped it from that point. She told me about how her family is doing, how work is going, those kind of things. We had a delicious meal. Wow, was that salad good. I mean I liked my entree too but that salad. I’m going to have to take the kids there before we leave. I bet they would love all the things in that salad. So at the end of dinner I had no plans to extend the evening. I was going to drive home and probably go to bed early. I was pretty tired from helping move out furniture and then rearrange the house all day. Well….

So we walked out into the lobby and she said do you want to come up so we can talk privately? I said come up where? She said to my room. I said no Lol She said then how about the bar? Okay. We walked into the bar and sat down in a booth in the back corner. It wasn’t a big room but it wasn’t full of people so it was a good, quiet, spot. She started in with she has been thinking about me for a while and this week I’ve been on her mind a lot. I said I have to go and started to scoot out. She grabbed my arm and said Let me say this please. So I sat back down and listened. She told me that she regretted not finding out how far our relationship could have gone and that she doesn’t want to get back together. She liked how well I treated her but I have not in anyway held her back from dating and trying to find love. She said she had a serious boyfriend but they broke up because he wasn’t honest with her about some big things. She said he was hiding things from her and she didn’t want that in her life. She said the age difference between us wasn’t that noticeable and she didn’t care. She hopes that I do find the love of my life, she knows it’s not her, and she really does wish me and the kids well on our move. I said we didn’t even have to have dinner for that we could have said that over the phone. She said well if there was a chance for us to start back up she would see it on my face or in my eyes. She said that I had made it more than clear that I’m not interested in her and that she just wanted a solid closure on us. I do understand that. I wished her well and said we can be friends. I told her maybe some time next year in the spring she could come up to visit. That would give me plenty of time to get moved in, get the kids in school and get through settling in. She said okay with a laugh.

Guys, I was sweating Lol I wasn’t sure where things were going and I didn’t want to be that guy that said “It’s not you, its me”. We didn’t have to go there and I’m glad. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings more than I probably already did.

She walked me out to the lobby. We hugged goodbye and I turned to leave. Then I turned around and planted a giant kiss on her Lol I have no idea why I did it other than if this was real closure, I wanted one last big kiss with her. She melted into it and I did the only thing I could think of. I bolted out of the lobby with no explanation.

Guys, I kissed and ran Lol It was a “walkby snogging.” If you have ever seen the movie that quote is from you would be proud I used that last phrase properly. I had 4 texts messages by the time I got my Range Rover and a missed call by the time I got home. I answered none of them. I know I will call her back some time today but not yet. I don’t know what to say Lol The majority of the texts were What the hell was that????? Do you want to start over??? Was that a goodbye kiss???? Hello????

I’m an idiot. When it comes to women I know NOTHING. I had a clean getaway, I had left things in a very mature, friend in the future, spot. I ruined all of it.

WTF am I supposed to say to her now? Hellllllllllllppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp!

Opening Day #GoBears

  Today is the opening day for the Chicago Bears. Go Bears! I gave my tickets to my buddy Josh. He’s taking his brother. Have fun guys. I want to go but I need to stay home this time. That photo I’m using as my featured image, isn’t that fish? I don’t know what kind but it looks like a fish plate.

Also tonight we are hosting our adoption attorney and her team for supper. I’m having it catered because she wanted fish. I don’t cook fish that well (Vegan) since I don’t eat it and I don’t want to screw it all up. I probably could have figured it out but I don’t want to. We have a great chef that comes to help us for our events when needed. I asked her if she was available and she said Ye$.

This weekend we are getting the party plans ready for next Saturday when we have our Baby Open House. Since we adopted Peace out of the blue we didn’t have a baby shower. We have the invites done and sent out already. It will be from 8am to noon because I have Cubs tickets for that afternoon Lol We will be at the office to make it easier for everyone to come see us. I don’t think it’s fair to ask all of our family, friends, employees, and co-workers, to drive all the way up here. I also want to show off our new building. Most of our family and friends haven’t seen it yet. It’s gorgeous! It really turned out great and I’m already filling up the bottom floors with leases. Very happy things went well. Much nicer building. My other one is getting renovated. We will use it for more offices for our other divisions. I think holding onto it will be lucrative in the next few years. Someone will make me a fat offer and I will take it.

Also this weekend we are taking my wife shopping for maternity clothes. Her stuff is snug. She squeezes into it and then she said she feels fat. I say you look beautiful and she said this is all your fault. This may be the only time I’m very happy to take the blame for something. Yes it is my fault! She helped!

Peace is doing great. She’s gaining weight and looking good. The boys love their little sister. I can’t believe she’s already 2 weeks old. It has been a big adjustment but I really think the boys are in that in between age where they want to help but they also don’t want anyone else to have my attention. It’s getting easier to deal with them now that I know when one of them is about to have a fit. Do you know who’s the biggest baby watcher of all? The darn cat Lol Tristan has stopped hiding and has decided he needs to watch after her every moment. He even tries to sleep in her nursery but we shoo him out. He wants to know where she’s at all of the time. When I pick her up and take her out to the living room he follows us. It’s the weirdest and sweetest thing. My dog does the same thing but he also hangs outside most of the day. He loves having a yard. I guess I thought taking him for walks 3 times a day or taking him to the dog park a few evenings a week was enough. I was wrong. He really loves this place. We barely see him until it’s time to eat. I have 3 water bowls outside that we clean and fill up twice a day. He doesn’t need me anymore. I miss him Lol At least he still sleeps in our room. That way I know he’s okay.

We are still getting in some great messages. Thanks again everyone. The name Peace is a huge hit. It fits her. Everyone says wait until she’s a teenager, she won’t be so Peaceful then. Maybe she will. I wasn’t that much of a handful as a kid. My wife says she wasn’t either, her parents confirmed that. She said all of her brothers were. The boys in her family are still getting into trouble.

I need to go get my wife up for work. She said last night she will get here when she gets here for our special supper. She is so busy at work. I told her don’t rush, it’s fine.

Hope everyone has a great day. Almost the weekend! God loves you and I love ya’ll too! Peace!

2 weeks of Peace

2 weeks ago today our precious baby daughter was born. It’s flying by. She is so sweet and quiet. She barely makes a fuss. Having a daughter in the house changes the whole dynamic. Both of the boys and myself are catering to her every need. As soon as she wakes up and starts crying the boys say Uh oh and come find me. I come walking out and say I know I know Lol They are her protectors already. I think that’s great! The dog also starts barking so he’s also a really big help.

This weekend was pretty chill. The girls finished up the last few days at #Lollapalooza. They have so many great pics and videos they shared. I put more of them up on our Family facebook page now. We relaxed and had a very good weekend.

This week I will have to go into the office tomorrow for half a day. There’s a meeting I have to sit in on because Lindsay isn’t going to be able to make it back here for it. She is flying all over the U.S. trying to handle my schedule. I can’t even handle my schedule so pray for her. Business is BOOMING! I don’t know why but we are at 65% capacity on all of our properties total. That is the biggest number we have ever had. We usually float around 40%-50% full. I’m so happy our leases are getting filled up and we can enjoy the economic boom the rest of the country is feeling.

No, it has nothing to do with Trump. It’s just the beginning of the end. The bubble always grows right before it bursts. Again like I’ve said, in 2018, s*** is going to hit the fan. I said that last year. I saw what was happening and I predicted a huge market shift.

My wife even pulled her investments out of the stock markets to protect herself. I told her leave it in, that is your money and she said no, I want to keep it my money. Amen. I do not invest anything in the stock markets. We invest in properties. Those are things I can’t lose because some other group(s) decides to dump all of their stock. It’s a safe investment and as long as we find the right people to run it, we are always fine.

Paternity leave would be pretty boring if I just had 1 baby. Having the boys run around too, that makes it so much more fun. This is such a great age for them. They follow me everywhere. They want to hang out. I’m loving it because I know when they hit about 12 I will no longer be “cool” or whatever slang word is popular at that time. I still think Lit is an awesome word. I try using it and EVERYONE IN THIS HOUSE ROLLS THEIR EYES AT ME. I had to cap that one.

Today is all about baby Peace and making sure she is still thriving. The nutritionist that we had with the boys is coming up today. I did not get along with her but my doctor recommends her so she is coming to do a check. I will do whatever I need to. I want to make sure she is healthy.

My adoption attorney will be joining us for dinner on Thursday. Without her I would have no kids. I asked her to come up tonight but she is busy. I’m excited for her to meet Peace. Adoptions are such a blessing. I knew in my heart that I would have kids I just didn’t know when or how. I really thought when I called her to tell her my wife was pregnant that would end our search for now. She said no, that is something that happens sometimes. I was not disqualified. Going through 1 adoption already helped us out with a faster process. She has already asked me if I wanted to go again. Of course I do Lol But not right now. I really do need to stop adopting babies. 4 kids all at once is enough of a great start. My poor wife Lol I still remember the look on her face when I said I know this is really bad timing but…

She is so happy though. She loves her little Pea. They have already bonded and Peace loves her mama. We have that new parent glow. I’m exhausted but that’s my own fault for not using my nannies more. I don’t want to. I have time off of work, I will sleep later. In a month. Or two. 3?

Have a great work week, while I’m just chilling with my kiddos!

God love you and I love ya’ll too!

Dinner and THAT play

Last night was our date night. We have had so much going on my wife turned to me Monday night and said when are you taking me out for date night? Uhhhhhhhhh (Checks my schedule) tonight? Tomorrow night? What night, dear? Last night it was. She has a big case she’s working on and needed to veg out for 1 night. She picked the activity, I picked the restaurant. Then she told me it was a play but wouldn’t tell me which one. She named 3 I’ve already seen and don’t want to see again. Usually we compromise things very well and honestly I usually go along with whatever she wants because she picks really fun things to do together.

She drug me to the same play I’ve seen 8 or 9 times, that I never really liked, and made me sit through it. She wouldn’t even let us ditch at intermission. Believe me I tried. She did promise some very awesome sex if I would be a good boy and shut up Lol Guess what I did the rest of the night? I shut the f-bomb up and had amazing sex as soon as we got home.

We both got all dressed up and I had car service come get us. She likes to get fancy every once in a while. It’s actually more convenient for me to just drive us places but some times she wants to flaunt our money and I’m okay with that, to a point. We had a very delicious dinner and I was able to try 3 new vegan dishes I had never heard of. That’s the thing about Mediterranean food they always have more recipes than you are aware of. Very delicious, all of it. Then off to the play. I was trying to get a little handsy in the car but she smacked my hand off of her leg and told me to behave. Then when I helped get her out of the car she kissed my cheek and said we can get naughty later. (Yes!)

We survived the play, I told car service Home ASAP! Then Heston was thrust into my arms as soon as we got there. I asked Sarah why he was up and she said he had been fussy all night. I got him to sleep while my wife slipped into something with no clothes and we had  very nice evening. It was well worth sitting through that play. Mental note I need to complain more often, the rewards are the best part!

Tonight she has to work late so I offered to bring over a picnic dinner for her and her co-workers. She said that would be lovely but also reminded me that may not be a good time for her to expect her to stop immediately and eat together. I said no I didn’t mean that I knew that she would be busy I just wanted to bring food that could stay there and when they all got time they can dive in. She said that was very sweet and yes, make sure I bring her chips Lol No problem. We only have 10 bags sitting in the pantry for her. I’m going to make up a bunch of sandwiches after work and pack everything up. Sarah can watch the boys while I run the food over then I will grab something for Sarah, the boys and I to eat for supper. Sarah wants, no big surprise here, italian. Which means I’m getting a salad. Whatever she wants, she’s still pissed at me for selling the condos Lol I have to be a little nicer to her for a few more days. That’s how it works with her and I know that from doing the WRONG things several times.

The paperwork has begun on our big move. We filled out countless forms and already filed them. It’s a GO and in 6 months we will be out of here.

It is Flag day and my American flag, USMC flag and Nebraska Cornhuskers flags are all flying high up at the lake house. My groundskeeper sent me a pic of them all this morning. Very proud of that. I like to represent anytime I can. God Bless America and all of that jazz.

And finally Lindsay came up with a brilliant new plan. Unblock all of the trolls from my twitter minus a few extra nasty women and report anyone that makes a comment to me or anyone I talk to. I didn’t think that would work but it did. I managed to get 3 troll accounts locked up over night and Kristie’s account is under investigation Lol How fun is that. These relentless, boring women really have no lives. It’s pretty sad actually. But like Lindz said the more they pick on me the less they are beating or cussing at their husbands and kids. So go for it ladies. I’m happy to be your target Lol We also planted Kendra with fake doclady as Lindsay refers to it with more bullshit stories to keep her twirling in the wind. That’s always extra fun to see when she eats the bait and makes a total ass of herself all over Youtube Lol It’s actually gotten easier to get her to believe the lies Kendra tells her. She’s so desperate for any info on me or Lindsay or Jackie that she actually sounds like she buys it. I wonder when she realizes it’s all bullshit meant to make her look foolish? I bet that will take a while to unravel. In case anyone is wondering, Lindz and Kendra are still bff-ish, they still talk weekly and in fact I just talked to Kendra yesterday via DM. Everything is cool and ya’ll got played, again. Sorry trolls but you deserve it Lol

 

Sunday Family Dinner

The Bears game was not as fun as I thought it would be. Because we lost and it looked horrible. Where is the offense this year? Why are they not throwing the ball? Traditionally the Bears are a running game but geez. Throw the ball! Cutler looks awful and he says the same excuse every year. We’re working it out. How about you work your way over to the bench Cutler?

Sarah didn’t even know what was going on so she said it was a lot of fun. She even booed when the crowd boo’ed at halftime Lol We did more shopping than eating. Which is great news for me because I have 2 marathons coming up and I don’t need to unfocus my diet right now.

Which brings us to family dinner tonight. Cam started a family dinner tradition with us a while ago. If we are at the lakehouse like we are this weekend he comes over at noon after we get home from Church and running around, and we plan out a menu. Then he hits the store or I go with him and we get what we want.

Today it’s pasta dishes. Lots and lots of cheese and meats. Yuck. Can’t eat either one of those so I’m making myself spaghetti squash and eggplant coins. Yummy! They are very delicious. Even the girls like them. We are going to cook all day until the gravy is thickened and perfect. We will eat at 2 then pack up and head home.

My boys, my adorable baby boys have all of a sudden become mobile. They just scoot themselves all over. And they are both up on their knees a little too. I think crawling is right around the corner, God help us all!

Both houses have been babyproofed since before they were born Lol I am crazy, I know. So we are ready. But are we really? Babies will get in places I never thought so we are trying to figure out some fencing and baby gate options. We have to because Sarah can not chase around 2 crawling babies all day long and also deal with my dog. That’s too much. If we can contain them on one of the living room areas, that’s plenty of space for them to zoom around it but she can also see them from the kitchen when she’s getting food ready.

Which brings me to the next milestone. My boys are eating baby food. Sort of. It’s more spitting it out than actually eating it but we are working on it. We started a little bit last month. Just to see what would happen. That was a no go. So we work on it on weekends and finally out of nowhere they like it. We are still doing some formula too. But it’s a lot of fun for me to sit on a chair and feed my baby birds. It’s so funny watching them try a different flavor. I bought one of each with the baby food. It’s all vegan. And I firmly believe that is the only kind of baby food you should feed your children. It’s the best for them. You can’t really argue that with me. And I won’t listen to any disagreement anyway. They like carrots, peas, and applesauce. Not a fan of anything else yet. We keep trying. It’s so funny when one is full but the other isn’t. So then I keep going until we give the doctor recommended amount. I was unclear on how much to start out with. The doctor told me they will let me know when they are full. And he was right. My boys are chunks! I mean they are not chubby rock by any means but they both weight a lot. Still very healthy and doing great. Things are changing so fast right now. I come home from work and Sarah reports the newest thing one of them has begun doing. It’s awesome.

I am starting to miss our late night feedings. They are sleeping mostly through the nights now. We put them down at 8:30 and they usually knock out around 8:50 each night. They sleep until 5 or 6. Then it’s time to get up. Which is when I get up to workout anyway. So I change butts, feed them, then bring them into my home gym and put them in their playpen. They watch me workout or run on the treadmill. They babble away and pull on their stuffed animals. When one starts crying I have to stop and see what’s up. And usually it’s just an attention thing. Then I get Sarah up, she comes to get them, I finish my workout, shower, eat breakfast then play with them both until it’s time to go to work. It’s a routine. I love it. It works great for me. And it’s working better for Sarah. She used to get up early with them but I told her let me do it because you have the rest of the day to do it. I can always come home and take a nap if I need one.

My life is completely different from a year ago. This time last year I was mending a broken heart and wondering WTF did I get myself into. Now things are completely calm and quiet. My life is awesome and I’m very happy. I’m making better decisions and I’m no longer chasing love. Love is finding me. And I feel so blessed.

Church was amazing this morning. It was about resiliency. I can honestly say I feel like I came from a really bad time in my life and things worked out great. Last year I felt like everything was bad. Now I know that life is meant to challenge you. That’s when it’s time to do your own work and figure yourself out.

I’m still here. I’m still me. And I’m still smiling through everything. Thank goodness God showed me how to forgive and let go. That’s the only way I could deal with all of it.

I am happy. I really am!

Have a great Sunday. It’s time to get this suit off and get ready to stir gravy all day Lol Cam will be here in a few minutes to help me plan out our family dinner.

Love ya’ll!

The party isn’t over

post-party-mess-3  My birthday dinner party was fun, entertaining, and surprising. It’s so great to be reconnecting with a lot of friends I had lost for a little while. Things are healing and going well. It’s a lot of my female friends giving me baby advice and a lot of my male friends telling me how lucky I am that I don’t have to deal with the first time mom. That’s not how this played out so I don’t even know what that might mean. I’ve heard their stories and a lot of them laugh through it now but there were some very touching and very angry stories told during dinner. I learned some of my buddies don’t know how to deal with a blowout. Yes, these are the terms I’m learning to use now that I’m a dad. I learned it’s hard to get the men up to feed the babies and when they come back to bed they have attitude. Where as the women claim they were not crabby and every story their husband or boyfriend told was exaggerated. My nannies all backed me up when I said I love getting up. I take over as much as I can. It’s the truth. Those few quiet moments with my sons late into the night just holding them. That’s when I do the most prayers. I hold them and ask God to make sure they live a long happy life. I’m at the stage right now that I don’t even care what they do for a living. I don’t care about what college they go to, or even if they do go. I just want them to grow up happy and healthy. This little scare with Alex from the start has humbled me so much. It makes me want to donate money to children’s hospitals and NICU units even more than I do. Those folks have it really rough. My son not eating as much and spitting up is nothing compared to those mom and dads with their kids.

My party went way later than I thought because we were all having such a good time. Normally my groups of friends and family travel in packs of 4 or 5 but this time we had set up the tables close together it was more like someone would stand up and tell stories then someone else would do it. It was like my entire life up for discussion. It wasn’t a roast because no one was being mean they were just telling stories about us growing up or in college. Some of the things I had forgotten all about. And that’s the beauty of life.

You can do something so small and insignificant for someone when you are in your 20s and not even think about it. And the person you helped always remembers you for it, and comes to your birthday party when you are 43 and shares the whole story. And it makes people look at you differently. I had 4 or 5 of those moments last night that I had forgotten about. But it profoundly impacted my friends back in the day and I realized that’s why they have been my friends since I was in college.

The presents are always fun to open. I’m extremely hard to buy for as everyone says. The guy that has everything. It’s always fun gifts. Some Batman stuff that I love. I have an entire collectible cabinet in my home where a lot of my action figures reside. And some of my rare comic books. Love getting that kind of stuff. But it’s the odd ball presents that make me laugh. One of my friends bought me t-shirts about being a Single hot dad and a few other shirts with funny dad sayings on them. I will wear them.

The evening was all I had hoped for. The ladies stayed behind to help clean things up as I showed the guys my new Escalade. I haven’t blacked it out yet, but I told them the things I was going to do it with it. It’s going to be a cool dadmobile soon. When we came back up my house was clean and lemony fresh. My maid loved it because she didn’t have to clean it up all by herself. She said we should hire them all to help clean Lol She always makes it seem like I’m a total pig. I’m OCD about my things. They have to go in the place I want them in or I go nuts. So I do clean up after myself very well. The only issue I admit to is I pile stuff on the dining room table. I never eat there. It’s my catchall. I clean it up on the weekends but by Saturday morning it’s usually piled high with whatever I was using that week.

I showed off my twins to anyone that hadn’t met them yet. We took a ton of pictures. Then when it was time to put them down we all had to try to be quiet which didn’t work out. It was great seeing everyone. I am so blessed in my life and love people flew out for my party. I told them in 2 or 3 weeks they need to come back for the baptisms. Dang I still need to call today about that. I just wrote that down to take care of. So many things are falling to the side because I’m not sleeping enough to keep myself up to date. I looked at my phone last night and the little red circle on my email said 1401. So I read the 1 and left the 1400 until later. I’m so far behind on work but I know if it was an 911 I would get a call.

Lindsay and Ben are in town until tomorrow morning. She is at the Chicago office now bossing, well probably bossing everyone. Which is funny since she is not a boss for that office at all. But the things we do in Chicago are feeding money to the things we are doing in LA/Las Vegas/Reno/Utah. So I’m sure she’s in there lobbying for more money coming her way. We did finally get all of the paperwork filed for the 2 new businesses we opened. It’s going to be a great addition. Very excited to see how things go. Every time we expand to another city I have that first week anxiety questioning myself if it was the right move to make. So far we haven’t failed. I plan out every expansion strategically for months. I stock up 40% over the budget they come up with for the incidentals that always seem to happen to me. And then I wait to see what the numbers bring in for profit over the course of the first 6 months. It’s exhausting and fun and always new. Everyday business is new. I love that.

Lindsay is flying to see her mom tomorrow and staying through Sunday night. She’s not doing well at all health wise and this was the trip they both agreed to sit down and have a serious talk about moving her to Las Vegas. I asked Lindsay if she was moving her mom in with her and she said *&(^ No! That will be interesting. It makes me miss my mom. But a lot of my friends’ moms have taken me in for years so I probably have 4 or 5 moms in my life.

Thank you all for the birthday messages. The old man pictures were awesome via text, the birthday love on my social media accounts and the messages here. There were several more to post but I deleted them. I read them all yesterday and loved that there wasn’t a single mean one among the group. I never look at the comments before Lindsay cleans them up so that was nice to see people still come here to read my blog.

I’m just a guy, with 2 babies, and a normal life. Pretty boring as my friends call me but I think my life is amazing. I love everything I have and everything I have went through to get here. There’s just one thing missing and that’s a wife. When my boys are older I will think about dating again but for now I’m staying single. This is so much better. And I don’t want to share my boys with anyone just yet. They are mine and I love them!

Hope ya’ll have a great week and enjoy upcoming Spring break trips if anyone is going anywhere. I usually go out of town for a weekend but can’t do that this year. I am going to take the boys up to my lake house for the weekend so I can start to figure out what it is I need to put there for them. I am almost done renovating the entire kitchen. It looked great the last photos I have seen. The nursery up there will be next. It’s a huge 8 bedroom house so I need to figure out which room will be theirs. Lots to figure out.

I’m going to start writing more now that I’ve figured out a schedule and get back to doing the things I used to do. I really thought I would have a lot more free time staying home from work and taking care of my boys. I figured, feed them, play with them, hold them, put them to bed then I would have 3 or 4 hours in between the next round of that Lol I was shocked that’s not at all how my days go. It’s one big blur of trying to remember when they ate last, when they slept last. Is there an App for that?

 

Random radio

Image2Thunder basketball or Monday Night Football? My fantasy football running back is playing but I have already won this week. I am 1st in my league. I haven’t lost at all this year. Love that. I think I’ll go with Thunder game. I haven’t had time to watch them play so far.
Today at work was very busy. Things are going well. We brought back a lot of information from the New York trip and our brokers are working on the leads. I hope things improve.  Work is all I have right now and I’m trying to do a good job.
I have this deep saddness inside my chest lately. Peyton says it’s my heart missing her, but unfortunately that’s not it. I’ve been sad before, but not like this. This has a stronger awareness. I don’t like it, but I can’t fight it. And that concludes the beginning of a very bad rap song or poem. That could have gone either direction, ya’ll be glad I stopped it before it began. I wrote a list of things I needed to tell myself this week.
1. Don’t quit
2. I need you to know, I’m waiting to find myself
3. Pray, twice
4. Feel the feel
5. Laugh
All things that could be goals. Let’s revisit this list on Friday, see how I did. I can say 3 is a shoe in. I do that all of the time. God is on my spiritual speed dial. Always has been. It is His Love that has brought me to my Deliverance.
That damn Justin Bieber album dropped and that’s all they play on the radio. I’m trying to write and “What do you Mean” just came on. I can’t help chair dancing a little bit while I’m typing. Anything with a beat and a good hook has my attention.
Damned if I do, that’s how I feel tonight. I don’t even want to deal with the emails. There are way too many. My personal one is stuffed full. I have 13 voicemails and I honestly prayed to get 2 more so it would be full and I couldn’t accept anymore voicemails tonight. I’m not in a mood to talk much. I want to veg out with supper, watch a little basketball, hit the shower and go to bed early.
Tomorrow is going to be busy. Meetings, conference call, meeting, lunch, investment strategy meeting, and then lease review policy. Nice. Already dreading it.
I’m glad everyone is coming here to read my blog, but I can’t wait until next week when this whole thing will be over and I can have my blog back. I love having 2 comments a month and maybe 50 visitors. I like being a mystery. It suits me well since I remain a very private individual. Always have been.
Linkin Park is on now. That always makes me want to go lift and push so hard my arms burn from the shoulder to the wrist. I worked out 2 and a half hours this morning. Obviously very upset. If my tshirt isn’t drenched down the back I’m not happy with myself. I’m trying this new carbo-vegan muscle milk thing this week. It tastes like the back of a dirty quarter. After it fell in a vat of burnt rubber and Cheetos. I don’t like it, but it’s supposed to bulk me up. We’ll see.
Dang, my dinner is getting delivered on time tonight. Catch you later, alligator. Love ya’ll!