Did you throw your shirt in a tree?

I have reached the point in raising twins that they don’t think I know anything. They argue with me when I present them with the right answer to their question. They also act like I’m dumb. They finally stopped whispering into each other’s ears when they are trying to figure out how to get out of trouble. The new thing is stand there and assassinate me with their words Lol Heston is not my shy one. He will blast away with whatever is on his mind. He’s good at holding back the big stuff but he eventually lets it out. I got yelled at yesterday because his life is too happy. It’s too fun. He’s always happy and he doesn’t like it.

Huh?

Alex is my social butterfly. He wants to be around people all of the time so they can listen to him talk nonstop. It’s cute and exhausting and I love it. He is so curious and wants to know everything about everything. He’s turning into my reader. Heston will get through a book or text to get it done with so he can go back to doing whatever he wants. Alex will bring books to us and say let me read you this really funny part. He loves it. I love seeing him read.

Twins is not easy at all. I don’t know how I have survived all of these years with them. It was much harder when the were babies. It’s getting easier but this is the part in life where I can really f*** them up if I’m not careful. I need to fill them with confidence, joy, strength of mind, and a sense of adventure. I’m watching when I criticism them, I’m being careful with my words. This is the age they start remembering big moments. I wanted to fill this summer up with so much travel but maybe this is God’s plan for us. Family time. ALL. THE. TIME! It’s not so bad. They can be annoying, I’m sure I can do. But we really have no complaints. Other than Heston getting mad yesterday and throwing his shirt up in a tree. I had to climb up and get it. Then I made him say sorry to the tree Lol He was confused but he did it and then we both laughed. He’s never going to remember that moment. But I will. And that’s what keeps me happy and loving my life.

My twins are turning into little people. It’s so interesting to see how their minds work. I’m doing the best that I can. It looks completely different than other parents but I think I’m doing great.

And no more shirts up in trees. I hope.

No, not that school

For reason’s I’m keeping private (Except my family and a few friends) I moved my boys out of the school I put them in and today was their first day in the new Catholic school. Things didn’t work out in our first school, I’m happier, the boys seem okay?, and this is my decision. I did get a lot of advice yesterday as this decision was pretty much being made for me. It was a no-brainer moment. So now we are in a school that’s very close to our new house and I think this is how we will do it.

I tossed and turned all night trying to figure out if this was the best move for me. Is this better? Is this what’s best for the boys? We will see when I pick them up this afternoon.

Peace. My daughter Lol I swear everyday she proves more and more than she is 2 going on 25. I keep feeling left out of her school life. She finally did hug and kiss me goodbye today but that’s only because I had a hold of her little hand walking into school and I wasn’t going to let her run off this time. Someone said she has a “girl squad at school now”. I was mad Lol No she doesn’t! She’s my baby! And yet she acts like I’m just her ride.

So how is everyone else surviving school? How are your kids adjusting? Mine are doing okay. We are trying to get into a routine. I purposefully kept them out of school until after we moved and did give them an extra week here to get used to everyone. I felt it was too much to move and immediately get them into class. We started late from everyone else but I really don’t care. It was a good choice.

Ok I just found the color setting block on my WordPress software and apparently I can color the background here.

That’s interesting. If I ever get fancy maybe I can start coloring the sections I want to emphasize on each post. Don’t hold your breath. I need to go pick up Peace. Brenda our new part time nanny and Sarah are going to stay home with Sky. I’m going to pick up Peace and take her to eat. Then we will grab food to bring home to the girls.

I really am enjoying my afternoons just with my girls. I get to hold Sky and watch Peace play. Or when Sky is sleeping give all of my attention to Peace. I love it!

Have a great rest of the week guys! I love ya’ll!

They are 2 and I’m getting old

Yesterday was our small family birthday party for my twins Heston and Alex. It’s still too soon to have a bunch of people in our home with Talon so we are waiting to do a bigger party for them in March with all of our family and friends. Because of the way Talon came into this world being sick my wife said we are holding everyone off to come meet him for a month. Whatever she wants to do I’m fine with. She knows best.

I was dressed in my Batman suit because it was a full on Batman party. I’m not going to be dressed up on the next party Lol No way. I realized how hard it is to sit down in that thing and it takes forever to get it on and off. I had to have help getting out I had sweated so much it felt glued on. However…

My boys loooooooved it. That’s the first time they’ve seen me in it. I have put it on a few times for my wife (Don’t ask Lol) and that’s been it. It still fits, which is amazing after how much we all ate during the winter. I’m happy to know it’s still in pretty good shape after all of these years. The hard part today is I have to clean it all up and that takes about an hour.

We had vegan cake, regular cake, ice cream, vegan ice cream, and an assortment of snacks. I took my boys out for a special birthday surprise. We got to meet some Super Heroes at a book event that just so happen to be on their birthday. They won’t know it was just a book event and not part of their actual party so we won’t tell them that until they are older. I got a ton of photos with a lot of the characters holding or behind my boys. It was really cool that when I said hey it’s their birthday today they all let me take photos with everyone. I had to buy 4 books but that’s fine because I like to read that type of book anyway. The other 3 copies will be mailed off to friends.

Seeing how much my boys have grown up, it’s crazy. I remember them being tiny little guys and how scared I was to even change the first diaper. I always felt like I was going to hurt them when I held them wrong or if I wasn’t sure how to hold them up on my shoulder the first few times. Now I just whip right through all of it with no problems. I was all alone when they were born. I had no wife, no girlfriend, no plan. Just me and my boys. Now I have a family for them. I have contact with their birth parents which is so important for me and them. We know their medical history and we also pretty much know what they will look like as they grow up. I’m so happy my amazing little boys are living a happy, stable, life. I’m doing my best everyday for them to make good choices and not get overwhelmed. I’m very patient with my kids and even when they are screaming bloody murder and I’m getting mad I keep my head cool and remember they are just little kids.

The hardest part for me about having twins is when I’m giving attention to one the other wants in on it and I try to balance that. I don’t know how to do it other than just try to keep focus one at a time when needed. Honestly most of the time my boys are either with me or they are near me. They really don’t leave my side that much during the day now. I love it. I don’t like the WWE style beatings they dole out on each other but I know that’s just boys. I remember my brother and I duking it out when we were little and it was a constant whooping that he would get Lol But I always hugged him later and said sorry. I know they will be best friends their entire lives. I want them to remain close to each other and close to us. I don’t care how old any of my kids are, they will always be my babies and even now when I’m out-of-town I make sure I call home a few times a day because I want to and I want to know how everyone is doing.

I love my boys so much. It’s indescribable how much I love my kids. I tell them everyday several times a day I love them and they are finally getting to say it back. They are smart. Man, are my boys smart. They will be smarter than me someday I know that for sure. I want to provide a happy home. I want my wife and I to continue to nurture them, teach them, but also let them figure things out on their own. I will always be here for my boys. Always. I know my family and friends will be too. I’m so happy things are going great. I know that my wife loves them with all of her heart and when we go back to the States for summer vacation she is seriously wanting to adopt all of the kids. She was the one that chose not to. I asked her to adopt but she said no. Then she realized that she is their mom. She feels it, she wants it, and I’m happy she figured it out. I knew she would eventually. I even told her when they all turn 18, go ahead and adopt them. I know that her hesitation was about me and my past and nothing to do with not wanting my kids. I have proven over and over I have changed and I am making better choices. I have proven my complete dedication only to her and I have given her no reason at all to worry about me and other women. Those days are done. Thankfully I got all of that out of my system before my kids were here. I have calmed down, I’m a lot nicer, and I really try hard to be thoughtful. She sees all of that. She said I really am her soul mate and these kids belong with us both in Heaven. She’s taking care of whatever legal steps we need to do and I will happily sign any paper to give her rights to my babies. I trust her with my kids. I trust if we get a divorce we will split custody (And that will be in any new paperwork Lol) but I also know that I will work with her. My kids are our kids and I’m doing my best to make sure everyday she feels like their mom. I think having Talon sealed it for her. Knowing we have a child together, knowing the best thing is to keep all of the siblings together. God forbid anything happens to me, I do want all of my children together. I knew Lindsay would always have them together and that’s why she was in my papers to take custody. She said she’s happy to give them up to my wife, but she also had an hour-long conversation where my wife said Lindsay basically told her if she visits and sees the kids in disarray she’s stealing them and taking them to Mexico Lol I’m pretty sure she means it. My wife just laughed but I got a pang in my heart like Oh god she would do it.

My boys, wow. 2 years old! We made it to 2 and I haven’t lost my mind yet.

Happy Birthday Heston William! Happy Birthday Alexander James! I love you with all of my heart and I hope we made your 2nd birthday very special! Long Live Batdad!

 

#Cubs win, of course

Last night my wife and I had a double date at the Cubs game. We met up with one of her sisters and the brother-in-law. Nice couple. I like them. We are all still getting to know each other but her sister pulled me aside and told me that my wife just gushes about me constantly. I guess I’m good at this marriage thing. She also said she’s very happy for her sister and that she just loves the boys. She’s excited about our little baby Cooper coming up in January and I’m glad to hear it. My wife talks to her family members daily. They are always texting or on the phone. I love they are so close. I hope I’m as close with my kids as they grow older. Her parents send texts. They haven’t mastered Facetime yet but they will learn. Very good people. Her family has just welcomed us in like we belonged to them forever. I was nervous the first time she took me to a birthday party and we were making our official debut to her family. It went great and it was a lot of fun. I’m usually wanting to leave those kind of things after a half hour. I have a lot of things to get done and I really am not used to just hanging out just to hang out. At least not at a party I wasn’t hosting. I pop in. That’s what I’m trying to say. I’m a pop in guy. Hey, great party, oh food. Happy (Insert whatever kind of congratulations here) this was great, I need to get going. That’s me. Not anymore.

The cubs won 3 to 1. Didn’t even need the bottom of the 9th. Looking good but still floating below where they should be. It’s early but time does go fast in baseball. The Astros are looking strong this season. Have you seen their record? Wow. 1st in the AL West. They are a team to watch. We all had a great time and I drug home even more Cubbie gear for everyone. They always have new stuff. I can’t help it. We are a Cubs family.

Tonight I’m taking the nannies, all 3 of them, and my boys to the game. It’s going to be beautiful weather. Perfect for my boys to be outside for hours. I’m aware we most likely are going to have to leave early OR we are going to end up holding 2 sleeping boys by the end of it. I want my boys to get experiences in crowds, to learn how to stay near Daddy and to listen. I also want them exposed to baseball. It’s a great sport and I’m an avid fan. The nannies have been group chat texting about their outfits for 3 days now. Like I care. Just throw on a Cubs tshirt and let’s go. How is that hard to decide. I guess it’s because it’s a huge place to meet guys (That are half drunk btw) and with all 3 of my nannies single I’m going to be saying, Don’t talk to that guy a lot Lol They make me feel old. They also make me watch them more than I watch the game. Someone is always hopping up to go somewhere. Last time Brandi was literally holding a hot dog and said she needed a hot dog as soon as a guy she wanted to approach went by. It was ridiculous. Women!

We are now at the half way point of the year and I’m leaning on Lindsay more to take over things. She is learning very fast and trying to get all of her Mexico business passed off to the 4 people that she is going to push it off on. I have 6 more months of this working career before I retire. I’m taking a break. I need one. I have kept my foot on the gas pedal for almost 10 years now. It was really hard in the beginning. It was just me and my secretary from Nebraska, Shelly starting out. She had all of the faith and I had none of it. She kept encouraging me to hang in there. Even when I lost deal after deal after deal. I’m so thankful I listened to her. I wanted to quit a dozen times but she told me the only way up is through. She was right. I’m excited or it to end. I’m also excited about cashing the checks I get each month for my ownership. It will be nice not working and still getting paid. Perfect timing too because our baby is due in January. God has blessed me so much. I almost feel like I don’t deserve this much good stuff.

I had won 2 tickets to go see the movie the Mummy at a preview event. I gave those tickets to my wife. She’s taking a coworker. I didn’t want to see it. It doesn’t even look that good but she said Ooohhh Tom Cruise so that was easy to give away. I know they will have fun tonight. She said movie previews are usually packed. Thanks again to NBC Chicago for hooking me up. I appreciate the tickets. They are going to get good use and the theater will be making money off of my popcorn, snack, soft drink loving wife Lol She always has to get the biggest combo they have then doesn’t even finish half of it. And doesn’t take it home to finish later. She says she thinks she wants more than she actually does.

Tonight’s Cubs game will also be a winner and I pray my boys enjoy it. It’s always Alex that has the issues. He just doesn’t like to sit still very long. Heston will sit on my lap and munch on his food with no problems. The girls usually have to take Alex to walk around a few times. That’s my boys. Identical and completely different. I’m so glad they are mine. We are a perfect fit. I love my family. I really do!

I hope ya’ll are having a good start to your work week. I will update more tomorrow. Have a good one!

Up early and ready for the day

I woke up with Heston at 4:30am. He has a little bit of a cough so I went in and gave him his meds. He didn’t wake up Alex thank goodness. Heather got up too and we decided to move him into his portable crib in the living room just in case he does wake up Alex with the coughing. We have the humidifier going in here and I’m sitting here watching over him. Heather is still up even though I told her to go back to bed. She said this is what I get paid to do. When they are up, we are up. That’s true. I think it’s from all of the weird weather lately. Cold, rainy, then warm, rainy, then cold. Chicago weather changes drastically. It’s supposed to be 52 today. That’s great. And 59 tomorrow. Even better. I know the girls are going to go shopping in Wisconsin this morning. Then off to a play this afternoon. I just want to be with my boys. Especially with Heston having this cough.

I just took my dog outside. He started barking at something out there and now he woke up my wife Lol She went back to bed. She checked on everyone then said mind if I go back to sleep, it’s too early for me. Go on. We are okay. I get up early anyway. I was hoping to sleep in a little but not if my boy doesn’t feel good. Heston is the one that rarely gets sick. I think he’s been sick 2 times in the past year. I think that’s very good. Most babies struggle more than that I think.

The good news we have to share this weekend is that next weekend we are all going out-of-town again. A road trip up to Wisconsin Dells. It will be a fun family weekend. We go up there a lot anyway. Anytime we are here at the lakehouse the girls do all of their shopping at the malls and outlet centers up there. Just easier and less crowded. I guess there’s some big sale going on this weekend and they can’t miss it. Oh boy! Have fun. I’m all about the Sons of Anarchy this weekend. I am on Season 1 and almost going to Season 2. It’s getting interesting. I think Clay is going to get beat up or shot or something. And now that Abel is home, things will change a lot. It’s interesting. The girls don’t like it so I watch it on my own. But not around the boys. I watch it after they go to bed or early in the mornings when I work out.

Is anyone else sick of Disney movies? I’m starting to see why the put that stuff on DVD. So you can play it forever! I know this hasn’t started yet but any new Disney movie that comes out on DVD brings itself to my house somehow. And we put it on the shelf for when the boys are older. I want to limit my boys tv time. I also want to limit their cellphones until they are at least 14. I think that’s a good age. It’s weird I’m thinking so far into the future but I have more good news to share.

My adoption attorney called and they found a little girl. She is 4 years old. Both of her parents have passed away and I guess no one in her family is willing to take her. She has been with a foster family for 6 months and still no one in her family has come forward. The state decided to place her for adoption and it seems like a good match. My boys being so young I wonder what an older sister will be like for them. I also worry about what this little one has been through. My wife and I have been praying on this for the right decision. I don’t know if this will fit or not. I was hoping for a daughter and I said any daughter is fine with me. I just worry that someone in her family will block the adoption. She does belong with her family but if they are unwilling, maybe this is God’s plan. I have until Monday morning to decide. There has been a lot of debate amongst our family meetings all week. Sarah said she is fine with it. The adoption would go through quickly once we agree and she may be home in 2 to 3 months. It all depends.

This adoption would be a closed one. I don’t know the family and I don’t want to know them. I want to know about them but that’s it. They all have had 6 months to step forward. After that much time has passed, I don’t want them to have access to us. There are a lot of things to consider. I mean we would have to get her into this fall. Am I ready for that? Do I want an older sister for the boys?

We are praying on it. I don’t know what to do. God will tell me. And we will honor His plan. Whatever that may be. This being April 1st, by June or July she would be home. Wow. That just hit me. That would give us plenty of time to get her room ready at the condo and at the house. I don’t know. We have been so back and forth. And then what if my wife turns up pregnant soon? I just don’t know.

I’m going to go back to doing my work emails. I’m not going to work out today. I want to sit here and watch over my son. His coughing has stopped and he’s sleeping so peacefully. Heather is dozing off on the other couch and I’m trying to type this quietly.

Hope everyone has a great day today! A fun weekend and  a relaxing day is all I want. I will update more later.

God loves you and I love you too!

Year 1: An Open Letter to my Sons

This is how our journey began:

http://www.notbatmanyet.com/2016/02/are-you-ready-for-this-kind-of/

I go back and read that post often. To see if I’m keeping all of my promises.

Dear Heston and Alex,

Today is your very first birthday and I can not wait to spend this entire day with both of you. It is 5:30am and I could not bare to sleep anymore. I am so excited for your special day.

Since I found out you both existed I knew that God was leading you into my arms. All that I had worked for, all that I had wanted in my life has always been for you. I said “I will take them” and those 4 words changed my life more than I have ever known.

As you have grown the last year I have documented all of your big and small moments both with the camera and with memory. Your baby books are filling up fast. They don’t mean anything to you right now but someday they will. We will sit on the couch together and laugh at all of the things I found so very important from last year.

I promised your birth mom to protect you both with my life, to love you and make you into good people, good men. I’m still working on that. You have meant more to me than I can ever find the words for. Your distinct personalities have been such a surprise to me as well as how much you two look exactly alike. I have always tried to treat you both equally and with compassion. I love you Heston as much as I love you Alex. You are the light in my life. You are my entire world. Everything I thought I knew wasn’t nearly enough before you came into my life.

Because of you boys I am a brand new man. Today we celebrate your 1st birthday. And your step-mom and I get the honor of showing you both off with such pride and honor. We all get to look back at your first birthday photos later on in life but today, I just want to focus on your wants and needs. Your happiness means everything. Keeping you safe and healthy has been equal to making sure you are having fun and learning new things daily. Your nannies, Sarah, Brandi, and Heather love you as much as I wanted them to. They have helped me every single day and have been there for both of you through everything. They are my tribe. And I could not have raised you through Year 1 without you.

I pray you have a wonderful day. Daddy has done all I can to make it a fun and happy day. I hope you have a great time with your enormous, loving family. Daddy wants that foundation to always be a priority for all of your lives. I need you both to know how much I love you. Daddy will always give you both my last piece of food if you want it. And that’s saying a lot because as you know Daddy doesn’t share food!

I love you Heston.

I love you Alex.

May God bless you both with 100 plus more years of this amazing life we are all building together.

Love,

Daddy

Birthday party or social event?

Thanks to Lindsay’s email and now Facebook page she created our small family get together has turned into a bigger party than I expected. We have ordered more food and drinks, more cake, and more seats and tables. Thanks a lot Lindz! She said each year will only get bigger so be ready. I hope not. I’m at work looking over everything and still trying to get through all of my To Do’s for tonight. We are leaving after supper to go up to the lake house because all of our family portraits are done and up. My wife wants to go see them. Fine by me. Because if they are not what we want on display we will yank them all down before everyone can see them. The proofs looked good but it always looks different when you blow photographs up.

The next few days will be all about the family and hosting them so I won’t get to update for a few days. I pray everyone has a great weekend and enjoys the rest of today. Wish me luck. It sounds like this birthday party is turning more into a social gathering. Geez.

God loves you and I love ya’ll too!

1st Birthday party coming up

We had an amazing Valentine’s day yesterday. It was all I wanted it to be. My wife loved it and all of the gifts she received. I also loved her gifts to me. She was overly generous. Thank you baby.

Back to the next big thing in my life. My boys’ first birthday party is in 2 days! The party planner has done a really good job. She sent me photos of the lake house. It looks like all of the things are set up and ready to go. Now it will be about coordinating all of the family and friends coming into town for the big event.

I still can’t believe they are going to be 1. I just can’t believe it. It has really flown by. I still remember the first moments of their lives. How scared then happy, how worried, then in love. And the sheer panic of the first few minutes of Alex not breathing well. Then hearing him let out his first cry and then they swooping him off. I thank God everyday for allowing their birth mom to choose me. She was really considering an abortion at first because she didn’t want her parents to know. She said she couldn’t do it and didn’t even seriously consider it because she didn’t want that on her life forever. I’m glad she chose to adopt them out. I’m glad my cousin called me that day to just vent and how slowly it turned into I Will Take Them. I was laughed at so many times by family, friends, and others. No one thought I could do it. I didn’t either Lol And here we are.

My wife is really starting to grow into family life. She is really excited about the party. She took the whole day off of work tomorrow so we can go up to the lakehouse to pitch in. She NEVER does that. She only took off a week for our honeymoon. So that was shocking. I’m happy to see her do that. It won’t mean much to them right now but when they are older I can say she took the day off of work for you guys because she loves you and wanted to help make your very first birthday party perfect. That will make a difference. I love her for it.

This small 50 person gathering has now turned into over 300 Lol Only because Lindsay got on the email and invited all of the employees and vendors we work with. We had to order more food because so many more people RSVP’ed for the party. And Lindsay said anyone that wanted to travel in for the party would get all of Friday off but they need to show up. I think that’s hilarious. I don’t see any of them fly all the way here just for this. But we will be happy to host them if that happens.

My boys loving coming to my office. Sarah brings them in more now that they have all of their immunizations and can be around big groups. She still doesn’t let people hold them. Or even touch them. She says Sorry germs for twins are double. Who can ever argue that one? That’s a great line. We have had a few runny noses but neither one has had a full-blown illness yet. Alex had a failure to thrive for the first 2 months but we got that reserved very quickly. He just had bad gas. A few drops in his bottle and he was perfectly fine. And he caught up with Heston within 3 months.

Geez, I feel like I remember everything. I think because I was so scared every day the first 4 months. Things got easier just like everyone said it would. Now that they are walking a little things will get harder again.

The party is going to be fun. We saw photos of the 2 smash cakes. The design looks great and the caterer will be making them first thing Friday morning. She’s bringing 8 cakes, 6 different round ones for the party and the 2 smash cakes. I can’t wait to see them dig in. Their smash cakes will be vegan so they can eat as much as they want. I am told they mostly squish it and only shove so much in. I really think Alex will squeal laughing and Heston will just pound the crap out of it Lol Two very different personalities. They look exactly the same. I thought about doing different hair cuts when they get older but I don’t know. We are going to match them for part of the party. Then after they get baths from the cake smashing they get their own outfits.

The next few days will be very busy for us. I can’t wait to see everyone and show off my family to everyone. They are my biggest pride and love. I married very well and I have raised two sweet and amazing babies.

1 years old. Geez! Did anyone think I would survive?

Thank you Sarah! She is the only reason I made it this far. And to Brandi and Heather thank you ladies too. All 3 of you are family and I hope we all stay together for as long as you want. Your help has been invaluable. Priceless even. I pray you all 3 enjoy the party without having to lift a finger for my boys. You deserve a great time and to get to watch them like we will.

Have a great work day everyone! God loves you and I love ya’ll too!